downtheAisle

2012

2012-01-04T00:08:00.000-08:00

Happy new yr peeps,i have tot of several titles to give dis post but cant seem to decide on which is appropriate.
I'm glad 2011 is over.it was one year i couldn't wait to be done and over with...the events of the year was a mixture of both cheerful and gloomy.cheerful cos of the birth of my munchkin...my SON the best thing yet that happened to hubby and I.
Gloomy with d bomb-blasts,young people committing suicide, spouses assaulting and killing,avoidable deaths,insincere politicians and governments with unrealistic laws etc.
I'm glad to see the back of 2011 and even though 2012 has started on the subsidy removal route for us in Nigeria,I am hopeful...,a greater measure of faith to live each day more than ever before.

And if i will borrow the words of "seriously doughnuts" which are exactly my thots for 2012,"Live,Love,Grow" and I'm adding.... 'PRAY' and 'STAY POSITIVE'.
Whatever holds in 2012 don't stop living,love with all your heart,build solid relationships and never stop learning, set standards for attainment...and PRAY,the feeling that you get after praying,knowing that you have handed it over to someone that has the 'know-how' of all things will help you stay positive.

For the which cause I also suffer these things: nevertheless I am not ashamed: for I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day. 2Tim 1:12

Happy 2012 people! and like my mum will say...odun ayo la ma se!*

ciao!

*Have a prosperous/happy new year!

we still dey!

2011-12-15T02:36:00.000-08:00

Its being a while in here everywhere has changed its like coming home and discovering the house down the street has been
renovated into a duplex now you wonder what happened to its former occupants,the corner shop has been demolished musa the mallam has disappeared and while your old neighbours were forcibly ejected the house still remain unoccupied you still have the ever mrs doubtfire neighbour still living here she's still good at giving updates of happenings in everyone's life...
suddenly you notice there's a hotspot/motel with funny looking people hanging around then you wonder how in the world did this neighbourhood allow this intrusion.While still in this mood you notice nothing has changed with the Jones' residence,their small lawn still well maintained, their blinds neatly arranged from the window view and you wonder if they are still as snobbish...the Joness' and their perfect life!
You have these rush nostalgic feeling and memories...how sweet and beautiful it was living here.These describes how I feel right now on blogger, just like an home coming,bloggers moved addresses,new blog templates,some moved to newer hobbies-twitter etc, newer blogs for different purposes and now news blogs seem to be the in-thing. I feels like a stranger in her own home but in familiar grounds ...im returning with experiences and most of all...another individual has entered d picture....yay!
I was here tell u about my lil prince, he's six months today and i tell u those six months has been a baby BOOTCAMP. With midnight wakes, investments in diapers and baby gears, hundreds of expressed breast milk bottles,immunisation runs,babycentre.com becoming my all favorite site etc...boot camp has had loads of activities but have there been fun parts of the camp sure...dress up runs...wearing new clothes at every milestone or when mummy feels like,the appearance of the first teeth(we had 2 at d same time),the cooing and translations,lil prince sitting up by himself,and the smiles i get daily absolutely priceless...
Its being 6months of motherhood i have had vulnerable moments but of cos the superstar mom moments mean so much more...i look at my son and im proud of myself...it is a privilege to have a child to be responsible for and to love,whether yours by birth or adoption.

Let me not rant too much...here's to my superstar baby.You've brought so much joy to our lives(your dad and moi) that we call you the Joy of our world...I look forward to when you grow older but i'll miss your babyhood.
As your parents we do not call ourselves superstars by ourselves we are who we are by the grace of God!

Here's wishing every blogger a Merry Xmas,and I say may our joy be continually full.

*****mommies and brides to be...enjoy the new season of your life you deserve it! and ask for God's wisdom every step of the way.

*****cobwebs has been cleaned and im back.

ciao!

Its exactly a Year!!!!

2011-07-13T11:04:00.000-07:00

My last post on blogger is exactly a year today, wouldn't that be calling my blog a yearly updated blog,the last post was on my birthday too...July 13th, that means...today is another birthday...WOW!!!!

A couple of months after I wrote the last post, I woke up to some strange and funny feeling, and my suspicion was confirmed bambino was on the way...I'm going to be a mummy and I was stuck with a big round tummy and my life at that point seem to be on a pause...then the writing mojo disappeared.

I could stay on and on reading blogs and updates and burning with comments but the energy to type out the comments never came forth talkless of updating my own blog. I updated my blog all in my head..the mental blogville and even imagined the comments from such posts all in my head...lol!!!

I noticed so many newbies in blogville,that was some breath of fresh air/read...my best read is ESCO---if you are not reading his blog, you are missing like mad!!!! his blog is it..especially if you are Nigerian, and grew up in Nigeria,you will relate well with his "Satire on the Nigerian life"(that's what he calls it). I remember the first time I discovered ESCO, I read all his posts late into the night and even forwarded some of his naija related posts to friends and family to share in his witty writing.

Naijamuminlondon, is also another favorite read of mine...and many times I wondered why she's waited this long to start blogging.

I also know that writefreak had a baby and so is Rita and favoredgirl... congratulations girls! and dollchic is engaged...congrats babe, Solomonsydelle has disappeared from blogville too...is there another bambino on the way????...lol! and Dear Sting...your blog was always the first I opened everyday...and I know I got angry sometimes when you had no new updates...lol...even your short quickie posts were daily tonic for me.

Thanks to everyone that sent my an email to check on how I was doing, LG dearie...u are too much. Mynewhitman, apologies for not honoring your invitation to write for your valentine edition...I saw the mail, but condition no even gree me do a reply...like I said earlier, my life was on a pause till 4weeks ago. Abeg sis, no vex.I will definitely make up for it some other time.

So am I back to blogville now? hmmm..., but I am thinking there might be some change of name or address...still thinking though!!!!!!!

So, its my birthday today, and I got a first 'happy birthday mum' card from my
lil'prince...after buying several 'happy birthday mum' cards for my own mum...now I get someone to return that gesture,isn't that something to look forward to a birthday for as a parent?

Enjoy the rest of your week!

Ciao!

I have leaped over walls and run through troops

2010-07-13T05:43:00.000-07:00

I have leaped over walls and run through troops.

If I could sum up my 365days from 13th july 2009...the walls mulitiplied, the
troops got fiercer, but I leaped and ran.

Yay!!!its my birthday today!

There were days I was most assured, he was right there with me, and there were days the walls multiplied and I felt the only reason they multiplied was because he had left me...How wrong I was. He never left!!!

Everytime I looked away...I saw the impossibilities and my lack of strength, but the moment I shifted my gaze back to him, I saw the multi-breasted one, whose
breastmilk can never be exhausted,it was more than enough for me yet it never went dry. I called it the more than enough...as I looked further I saw
a Father that can be trusted and relied upon...the one that does not give his eyes to sleep,the one that would never give up until I won.

Lord I'm thankful today, when I think of the "BIG" things you have done, but I am much more grateful for the "smaller" things...the things a fool would take for granted. For I know, it takes you behind the "BIG" things just as behind the "small" things".

My List of "small" things are endless

The nights I cried myself to bed, yet I woke up with a refreshing word to face the day...there are people in therapy because they are depressed.

The days I pass on the third mainland bridge and I see fellow human beings whose jacuzzi is the lagoon and their water-bed is under the bridge...how could I not be thankful for a warm bed and a beautiful home everyday.

The mornings I can ride to work in a car and avoid being beaten by the heavy rain storms and wading in the many waters that floods lagos while fellow brothas and sistas are drenched in the rain or probably cope with the carcass called the public bus,...have been there and I know what it feels like arriving at the office in soaked clothings. Lord I'm indeed thankful!

How about the smile I get when I meet the need of another of your child, that smile..utterly priceless, knowing fully well, that at that moment, I was the angel they needed to know or may ever know.

Times I walk into a shop to buy a new clothings and fret about style and fitting,Lord I'm thankful because there people out there that how what they wear fits is the least of their problems.They have more pressing needs. Yet you clothe me as the lilies of the field.

While I wonder what my birthday this year would look like, what gifts I want, and what to wear...countless people are out there who do not know their birth dates and would rather be dead than alive 'cos they think life as being unfair and feel suicidal over life.

The marriages of my friends,the thought that they found Love and Love has caught up with them

The miracle of conceptions, carrying to term of the foetus and the birth of a new life...another miracle of a God that does not despise the days of little beginnings.

The joy and love of a family...when i think of families torn apart by wars , I am most thankful.

The love of a wondeful man in the convenant of marriage, what else can teach me the essence of christ as the groom and the church as the bride, and the marriage of the lamb.

This is no way is to spite anyone, its all to expound the greatness of my God...who does the "BIG THINGS" and still the "small things", the one that causes to RUN and LEAP...the almighty GOD!

If have had no reason to do a thankful post in 365days...my birthday isn't a bad idea to do that. yay!!!its my birthday today!

ciao!

Still thinking of a Title!

2010-06-16T02:52:00.000-07:00

Why am I so lazy to blog...Its not like I don't have anything to write about,
but somehow sheer laziness wouldn't allow. I have had posts since the last time i put up a post..(2months ago...that's some huge long time...its shameful seeing that against my blog name
on other bloggers' blogroll)

This laziness!!!! yes this laziness, does not stop me from reading other
bloggers update and to even put a comment o!...but to type a full post,issue...big deal!!!(receiving and not giving...lol!)

I have a few thoughts in my head...let's call it randoms

***Why is it that in Nigeria, after the wedding day...two becoming one; suddenly becomes many more...you must have one family member come to live with you. Its either a nephew or a niece or a cousin asking to come and visit, and then the visit becomes longer than necessary and you notice you have acquired a compulsory first son or daughter or live-in uncle or aunt automatically.

*** For Couples that have their children share their beds overnight I am wondering.. just wondering, do you consider having sex at anytime during the night? when you do,and need to have sex,what do you do? cos I am wondering if they need to, do you leave the children on the bed, and go to another room? I presume this is the logical thing to do, or do you move them to another room..but what if they wake up again, and come knocking in the moddle of the 'DO'..lol
I asked my husband this question, he says I should wait till that time comes...he's probably clueless. I guess he does not have the answers...but of course I know I can throw it open to blogville...I trust I will get answers.

*** I wonder why anyone will drop a comment on my blog in chinese!!!!CHINESE...ki lo de!

*** Congratulations to the blog award winners and nominees, you truly deserve it, you've not only made my web rounds inspirational and memorable, you guys have been consistent. I don't take your consistency for granted at all.I know it takes a lot, to be up here everyday...for your dedication and commitmment...You derserve the award!

*** I plan to be back here for a proper post with a proper title by weekend, ... enjoy the rest of the week!

ciao!

Who deserves the sh*t??? in the cheating game?

2010-04-12T04:00:00.000-07:00

I had a totally different post to put up this morning until I read the latest post on inmydreamsitwassimpler.
This post has absolutely no connection with the plot of the story and neither am I querying the writer of the post in anyway.

I will like to add as well,this has nothing to do with Me, My Husband or My Marriage, I am just intrigued by the drama that ensued in this episode as this same drama is as old as love,relationship and human existence...The drama that plays out after the act of Love or Relationship Infidelity ,is in the open.

I hope you guys have been reading inmydreamsitwassimpler, its a brilliant work and I support it all the way.Its a product of the literary works of some intelligent and bright ladies we have in blogville.

Read excerpts of the story
The day of the funeral started out gloomy; the skies were grey
and were accompanied by an intermittent drizzle. Dressed in a
knee-length black wrap dress and a wide-brimmed hat to match,
I was one of the last few to arrive. Taking a seat towards the
back of the church behind some other mourners, I looked towards
the front and saw the back of my husband’s head.
He was seated right behind a row of some ladies. I think one of
them was Dolapo. I took a closer look. One of the ladies got up
and walked towards the front to speak a few words. It was her;
his mistress, Titi. I’d been wearing my Ed Hardy sunglasses but
I took it off now and stared at her intensely, willing for her
to look my way. She started speaking and then caught sight of me.
I smiled at her and nodded.I could tell that it threw her off as
she faltered through the rest of her words.
Some people tried to look back to see who or what was causing
the distraction but I was strategically positioned and as such,
they couldn’t really see me.Glancing periodically my way, she
managed to get through her tribute and as
she returned to her seat on shaky legs, I discreetly made my exit.
I think I had made enough impact for the day. Or had I?
Walking out, I caught sight of Dayo’s car. I looked around to see
if I could see Titi’s car. I saw it a few a feet behind Dayo’s.
So I did what any wronged woman would do.
Ensuring there was no one watching,I took out the Swiss Army knife
that I always carried with me and managed to make gashes on two tires each.
I made it as close to the rims as possible so no one would easily
guess what had happened. Oh sure, they’d probably figure it out by the
time they tried to fix the tires. I had thought to do just one,
but with my adrenalin pumping, two seemed like so much fun.
I’d never done anything so brazen. God forgive me! The sun was out now.
An omen maybe? I guess the day wasn’t so gloomy after all.
I walked off briskly with a smile.

(Here Madam is either the girlfriend,fiancee or wife while Mistress is the other woman,girl or lady whichever is appropriate)
Summarily,Mr Man is caught in the act, he's having an affair, a step further you discover who the bitch is(pardon my french!), you have her name,her mother's name, her cousins,her favorite hang out,who are friends her, her signature perfume, everything, the color of her car,number plate ...what else!

You plan your first meeting and plot the scene, first things first, 'what's spectacular about her? slimmer or fatter, is she drop dead gorgeous or just there, you ask the questions.
The plot, probably disgrace her at her office or the salon...or at her favorite hangout or at the mall...you wonder where will the gist spread faster and show the world she's a man-snatcher and slut . then give her some beating
or hot slaps, so she gets a blue eye or red eye or black eye...that's probably too easy, or even an acid attack or something, spoil the fine face and body Mr Man cannot
do without,and leave her with a scar for life! I can go on and on. The bottom line 'she must be dealt with'.

Folake in this story has acted the drama, the aje-butter way(civil way...what's the english of aje-butter), she gives Titi the look which says...'so its you abi?' exits to slash her tires at the carpark...easy one, I say.

Over time I see women attack the other woman whenever there's a cheating game, There are gory details of the madam catching the mistress and the kind of drama that plays out. You have name calling, clothes ripping, acid attacks,beating up etc.
In nollywood movies the treatment is worse...lol!, the mistress may even lose her life...

I ask, who do you think deserves the brash treatment more? Mr man or the Mistress? Most times, the madam wants Mr Man back at home behaving and repentant with his zips up,and all he gets is stern warnings and maybe some months of silent treatment and sexual deprivation.If he's able to convince madam he's really repentant, then things are back to normal before you know it.

Now, you say.."downtheaisle are you saying the mistress should be left off the hook just like that, afterall if she had not conceeded to the act, Mr Man won't have any reason to be involved, or betterstill why didn't she scheme all she can and get Madam's contact and tell her of Mr Man's escapdes and everyone lives happily ever after" sensible argument I say.

Well, In my own opinion I think the Men get off too easily,he's probably not embarrassed at the barber's shop like it could happen to the mistress at the salon, his clothes are still intact when the mistresses' clothes are ripped and torn, he only enjoys a few slaps while the mistress is given the beating of her life,Only in rare cases would you hear of a cut-off genital when in many cases you hear of an acid attack on the mistress or some other brash treatments,he probably does not get too much stares of 'useless man' instead the looks are more like 'nothing is new under the sun' while Madam get's the immature and jealous woman look
while the Mistress you can bet...she's got the bitch label for life!

So let's spill....who deserves the name calling,bashing and the drama when caught?

Remember I am in no way, applauding the mistress...hell No!!! A man that lives in deception is up to no good,even if the affair started without you knowing there's another woman, the moment you know or sniff a fellow sister in the air... flee!!!!! What's the point wasting time and emotions on a deceptive man,when You can get a good Loving from a sincere man!

I believe there should be matured ways of dealing with the Mistress when the need arises...one of which is dialogue.
Again, how do you dialogue without getting angry and raising voices yet making it very very effective atleast you get the mistress to leave and dread your man!
Let's hear mature ways of dealing with the Mistress as well.
Have a lovely week!

ciao!

To have and to hold! Meet the Longest-Married Couple

2010-03-20T12:16:00.000-07:00

I am talking about marriage again,.....Everyday when I meet people I always want to know what makes their marriage "tick" and many other times, to convince myself that there are really no super woman or man in marriage,marriage works when we make up our minds to Work it.

Also, I like to face the reality that the wives can and will sometimes nag when they are stressed out, and the husbands can and will sometimes want to Lord over their wives. Do we also remember when the season is just dry!!!! as in dry...maybe no salary increment, mortgages and bills, school fees etc and there's just a little left to afford a weekend getaway talkless of a vacation. Most importantly I want to read and hear of the satisfaction that couples have gotten from their marriage inspite of the currents from wadding through the stormy waters.
Enough of my blabbing...

So,here's the longest married couple,Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher, lovebirds from North Carolina who got married in 1924. Below are excerpts of their interview/responses on twitter.

ALso, thanks to my friend, qmoney for forwarding this to me as well...thanks babe.

If I ask you, how what was your first impression of your husband? or wife or fiance or fiancee?
Here's what Zelmyra's response is?
Zelmyra says, she remembers what Herbert looks like when they first got married, in her words,“He was not mean; he was not a fighter,” “He was quiet and kind. He was not much to look at but he was sweet.”

Interestingly, he was not much to look at...but he was sweet...lol! Let me explain she meant "he was just there,very there...lol!" because if she saw him as an handsome man,i'm sure she would have said it, but see, Zelmyra says "he was sweet". Hunnnn....Do looks count?... maybe, sometimes

The Fishers, who are African-American, were poor when they got married, but they worked hard to create a good life for their family, despite the difficulties caused by segregation and racial discrimination. They had five children, and raised enough money to put them all through college. At last count, they have ten grandchildren and nine great-grandchildren.

Hunnn....Marriage and Money,how important???? My take on this;Money is important and vital don't be deceived. The Fishers, worked hard..they raised enough money inorder to give their children ample opportunities. What do I say, if you must marry, then be ready to provide simple!

A man who is unable to provide for his household is worse than an infidel, and a wise woman buys and owns fields...remember the Proverbs 31 woman. Howbeit small, a woman should have a source of income.

In their response on twitter, they said
"There’s no secret to our marriage, we just did what was needed for each other & our family. "
Zelmyra says ,"A hard worker & good provider. The 1920s were hard, but Herbert wanted & provided the best for us. I married a good man!"

Winning together-An unbeatable team“Everyone who plants a seed & harvests the crop celebrates together” We are individuals, but accomplish more together. In marriage, it becomes beautiful, when you both realize that accomplishment becomes meaningful when its achieved together, marriage is not about outwitting each other or competition.

Do they fight?
I presume YES, their reply...NEVER physically! Agree that it’s okay to disagree & fight for what really matters. Learn to bend - not break! I believe that any man that raises his hand to hit a woman is a coward and I hope there are no sistahs out there that believes a woman has to be beaten or hit to teach some sense(I have heard this nonsense from some quarters..please don't belive this crap!)

What's their advise on a bad relationship day? "Marriage is not a contest, – never keep a score" I say, Talk about it and let it end there...no future referrals to past faults or scores...hunnn(is it really that easy?)

When asked to share the best marriage advice they've received: : Respect, support & communicate with each other.Be faithful, honest & true. Love each other with ALL of your heart."
Source: The Fishers' Twitter Account. 2/14/2010.

Need I say more?

Have a lovely weekend!

ciao!

http://gimundo.com/news/article/worlds-longest-married-couple-share-relationship-advice-on-twitter">http://gimundo.com/news/article/worlds-longest-married-couple-share-relationship-advice-on-twitter/">http://gimundo.com/news/article/worlds-longest-married-couple-share-relationship-advice-on-twitter

pictures from http://bulletin.aarp.org/publish/etc/medialib/aarp_media_library/bulletin_ii/your_world__family.Par.39600.Image.0.0.1.jpg

And it was our Paper Anniversary

2010-03-03T08:13:00.000-08:00

Feb 21, 2010 marked our first year of marriage as well as 1yr of being officially Mrs downtheaisle.
Truly no two husbands are alike, likewise no two wives are the same...are you surprised?

Everyone is an individual, and that makes every marriage different.

Its not everytime I want to go to bed in some sexy lingerie, there are times I want to sleep in that boubou... and just look ugly.
Its not everytime I have something to say and pay compliments..there are days I am in the 'shut-up' mode.
Its not everytime I want one in-law or family friend around, there are weekends when I wantto spend it alone with my soul-mate.
How about the times I want to stay in bed and curl up to read some good book and making lunch or dinneris the hardest since hard?
And the times I want to speak up and shout back at my soul-mate because I disagree, but somehow Ifind myself letting the event pass.
I forget the times when I am forced to sit through a sport rendevous or some boring program showing on TV and pretend I enjoy every part of it.

In all this,

I have learnt to go on my knees for things I couldn't change on my own,
I have learnt to deal wisely...wisdom is principal in marriage.
I have learnt how to respect inorder to earn the respect I desire to get from my spouse.
I have learnt to balance my 'off' and 'on' modes.
I have learnt that submission is mutual,I can submit easily when my husband recognizes that my submission is not because I am weak but because it is necesary for the strength of our marriage.
I have learnt that I cannot always be right,and Its not compulsory that I have my own way all the time.
I have learnt that when a man loves you, his criticisms are not to tear you down but to build you up.
I have learnt its Ok to be angry, but also be able to justify the reason for my anger.
I have learnt that the success of our marriage is dependent on two of us, not just the woman as we are used to hearing, its a convenant between two people.
I have learnt our vows are very important, it was taken before God and we cannot make a mockery of it.

My first year of marriage was full of lessons, I can bet as the years roll by, the list of lessons will increase. I would say...the beauty of marriage, is seeing that after 50yrs..60yrs..70yrs,we are still together, loving,learning and still having the spark that drew us to each other the very first time.Truly, marriage becomes all that you want, when its with the right person!

Here's to wishing anyone willing to take the testimonial walk down the aisle, all the wisdom you need with the joy and hapiness that comes with building a happy home!

I pay very little regard...to what any young person says
on the subject of marriage.
If they profess a disinclination for it,
I only set it down that they have not yet seen the right person.
Jane Austen (1775 - 1817),

2009... What a year!

2009-12-31T06:55:00.000-08:00

In a few hours from now, the start of the year that ends the decade begins what a journey to this milestone!
2009 is rounding off, and the curtain is about to be drawn, suddenly, the fireworks will
go up, and usher in the new year. 2009 becomes history!!!

Did we win all? Or did we lose some? Probably...

King Solomon spoke about the different seasons of life in the book of Ecclesiastes, 2009 definitely had such seasons in our lives, if I’m right.
While the recession saw many people bidding a farewell to their dream jobs and career, It opened up opportunities for some other to climb up the career ladder.
While business folded up, many others launched into newer business frontiers and smiled to the banks.
Did we lose loved ones,...Yes, but we still know of the new births into the world.
What of those times we almost gave up and thought life was no longer worth living, many others labeled those times as their time to reign and shine!
How about the relationships that became history, while others found love, met their soul-mates and even walked down the aisle.
Did the habits keep you down? How about the resolutions you made...out of the window they flew yet some overcame their habits and no longer have battles with them.
How amazing life can be!!!! The interesting things, that makes up our very existence.

As 2009 draws to a close, we have had our share of winnings and our slice of losses. The best part of each day is the knowledge that tomorrow is available for newer opportunities.
So what then do we ask for?
The grace for another tomorrow and maybe, a thousand tomorrows. The person who succeeds is not the one who holds back, fearing failure, but the one who moves on in spite of failure.

There's a new lease of life available to you in 2010, don't start 2010 licking wounds on what you lost, licking wounds has suddenly become inexcusable, remember failures are only temporary tests to prepare us for permanent triumphs.
Learn the lessons and move on, that is the true mark of a survivor.
Recover from the loss of a loved one, and dare to make a mark in the life of family and friends!
Recover from the end of a relationship and dare to Love afresh!
Recover from the loss of a Job or the demise of a career and dare to succeed in your new found vocation.
Recover from whatever losses that abound in 2009, push the YOU for the days that lie ahead in 2010.
-start the book
-write the exam
- make the proposal
- Join the Club
-Start the gym
- prepare your resume
-Love again
The list is in-exhaustive.... The only thing that can stop YOU is YOU...
How about the winnings in 2009?
Seek for newer mountains to surmount in 2010, seek greater challenges, and Make plans for the next victory. Make plans to increase in influence, abundance, and favor.
Take a step of faith into the life of victory He has in store for you!

We can do all things through Christ who infuses strength into us
See you in 2010, and have a winning 2010!!!

P.S. Did I apologize for my long hiatus...no be my fault o, I am back!
P.Ss . It’s absolutely nice to have you guys as a blogfamily, your blogs and posts made my year!
P.Sss. -I typed dis post from my phone so formatting and layout maybe poor

Ciao!

A very very very quick quickie!!!!!

2009-09-28T13:53:00.000-07:00

wat's gud blogville, have not been here in a while....

I had a "crazy" september, loaded with "Work! work!!and work!!!. I had to do my hand overs, as you all know, I'm moving jobs. I barely had a leave(I can'tcall those days, leave) cos I had to enter into my wifely/daughter/sister-in-law/daughter-in-law roles by fire by force.

I even missed my blogversary,I can see I am almost a month behind all the updates in blogville.

Ki lon sele? what's been happening around here, I can see update headings on write freak and the police,then so much posts to catch up from kemi of "till my daying day",and dear FFF saying something about being "rosy" or something, I can also see original mgbeks......"wanting to have her life back" post.... and then not to talk of sassy trend...with her daily posts, I wonder how i would keep up. I don miss blogville.

Menh!!!! I don miss this place!!!Instead of turning this "quickie post" into the real post, abeg free me, let me catch on gists around here,I'm rushing off to read blog updates. I will be back by weekend to give a proper update.

Have a great weekend, and enjoy your October 1st!

***I resumed today, and while I was being shown around, I tried to figure out if I could tell a fellow blogger from the faces my new colleagues...lol

***pardon me, I didn't read through this post, so grammatical blunders may not be far-fetched.

Rev21:5(King James Version)

And he that sat upon the throne said "Behold I make
all things new".
And he said unto me, write for these words are faithful and true.

aunt,fantastic news,addiction

2009-08-31T01:08:00.001-07:00

Hey, how was ur weekend, restful???stressful???lots of parties???? don't worry, Before you know it, Friday is here again!

My aunt was finally buried on Friday, the ceremony started with a service of songs on Thursday and as expected, unending and glowing tributes.
"Why do we get to know how humble,amiable, caring etc. we are only in death?"

I conclude, we take our relationships for granted that we don't realize that there might never be a tomorrow to say how much we mean to each other.

My uncle, saw his first and only love being lowered to the ground forever, the Love he had known for 35years, through the cruelty, pain,victories, and successes of this world. What would life be like to wake up to an empty part of their bed, a bed they shared together till her death.
How about dressing up and seeing her favorite things in the closet with the owner six feet under the ground( He could trade the favorite things to have her back). It left me with this question "why do we lose that which we love so much?"
My aunt was a woman that successful struck that balance between career and family.She attained the peak of her career being the professor in a rare area of study, her job required lots of research and travel yet her role as a wife and mother was never neglected. She was a firm believer that the woman, is the builder of the home.

She constantly said " Ojo iku lojo isimi"(The final rest is in death). I know she getting all the rest she deserves in the bosom of her savior.
***************************************************************************************

Remember the test (footnotes of this post...http://takingthevows.blogspot.com/2009_07_01_archive.html) I finally gotten the job. Yours truly, has got a new job!!!!
A fellow blogger(make I talk am..lol???) calls it fantastic offer, well dis same fellow blogger and I will be working in the same coy, she got a fantastic offer too!!!
Can I add, this babe-blogger is too correct, she gave me all the scoops I needed on the interview, and what to expect, including how to go about the negotiations.

Its actually a fantastic news, considering how I felt after the interview. The moment, I stepped out of the interview, I sent an sms to hubby, "sweet I didn't impress myself at the interview o!!! I think I don goof o!...l8r"
I was keen on impressing myself(cos I didn't answer satisfactorily a question I felt pertained to the job function, as if I would be responsible for selection...lol, meanwhile,based on my own assessment I felt the other questions was not enough to get me the job)
How we worry over things that are not supposed to be our worries.

Hubby called me back immediately, and said I had to be careful on my words if I really wanted the job. He was like, "when you have goofed, that's when favor makes all the sense,favor treats your f**k-ups, you are blessed and that's all the advantage you need"...How very true!

In my over worrying state,(silently praying for favor), I tried to get some insider info to know wasup with the position. The info was like, there was guy(apparently he's an employee of the company,he also applied and was interview for the same position), and I, who was being considered for the position. The panel were planning to organize another interview for the two of us, as we both qualified for the position before making recommendations.

Of course this news depressed me, I was like the guy works with them already, so he has more chances of getting the job. Besides, he could "press" buttons to get the position, after all he would have contacts already in their HR.
I was totally wrong, while I worried and planned for the 2nd interview, God had a different plan......suddenly, I got a call to come over for salary negotiations and finally pick up the position.

I might not be able to explain how my name came up for the position, but I can truly see the writings on the wall.....FAVOR!!!! This time, I have not escaped his favor.

Finally, I hate to admit this, but I smell some addiction to blogville.I am still loving this place though!!!

1. Blogger is like number 6, on the top ten things on my mind.
2. The first thing I do when I get to the office is to read blog updates...even before I check my mails.
3. I always have a browser dedicated to blogs...with atleast 18blogs open.
4. I can't go two days in a row, without reading blogs...even if I don't comment, or too lazy to post, sometimes I wonder if I earn a living reading blogs
5. I typed this whole post in my head at 3:45am, on Saturday..sleep refused to come, and the next thing I thought of, was arranging my blog posts in my head.

Gotta go,
For the week...Habakkuk3:17-19(Today New International Version)

"Though the fig tree should not blossom
And there be no fruit on the vines,
Though the yield of the olive should fail
And the fields produce no food,
Though the flock should be cut off from the fold
And there be no cattle in the stalls,
Yet I will exult(glory,revel,take pride,rejoice) in the LORD,
I will rejoice in the God of my salvation.
The Lord GOD is my strength,
And He has made my feet like hinds' feet,
And makes me walk on my high places."

Have a lovely week!!!

dTA

What do you like about being single or married?

2009-08-11T01:29:00.000-07:00

Its being a while, not done any post in August waoh!!!! How's ur week going?

I got the title of this post, while chatting with a to be "September Bride" she's afraid she's going to be losing all her sassy singleness and Independence to become the Madam/wifey of the house. As much as she's surrounded with all the excitement of wedding planning, she says she would miss being single. My initial reaction to her mood(or what do I call it now), was more like *****bloody attention seeker****mschewww****

Taking a flip side, I decided to give it a thought as well, and throw it open on blogville:

"If you are single, what do you love about being single, and if you are married, what's about it you love?"

So let's get talking!

At some point in our lives, we are either single or married.Yeah Right! Single ( without or with boyfriend, girlfriend,engaged status whichever status) and Married( some form of exchange of marital vows either through traditional means,customary court or religious).

I am often asked, "what's life like as a married woman?"(every newly married woman is asked this question, sometimes in other variations like "how is married life?"..) most times, I just smile back and give no clear or definite answer. Was life as a single lady that interesting and memorable? Do I miss being single? what's with married life sef?

As a single lady, I enjoyed owning my own space at my own time, in marriage the space is co-owned, it becomes OUR space and not MY or YOUR space any longer.

What do I love about being married?...... I like the level of responsibility that marriage places on you, as a married person you become accountable, and you know that someone counts on you always to be a partner in building a successful home, not a responsibility that is burdensome but more of mutual trust,respect and love. This plus so much more I like about being married.

I am curious, what do you love about being the sassy single lady or the diva looking wife(aside the pressures of getting married you got from the society,family inclusive). I'm waiting to read from you!

ciao
dtA

I can't think of a title now

2009-07-29T06:25:00.001-07:00

hi my peeps, how has the week been? I still can't think of a title for this post(maybe, I will figure out a title before I finish typing). I planned on putting up a different post until I received this email via my office mail client. I liked it, it sounded familiar too(had a similar conversation with hubby on Sunday). The female conversationalist sounds so much like me, maybe like many of us sometimes too.

...."Why was my burden so heavy?" I slammed the bedroom door and leaned against it. Is there no rest from this life? I wondered.I stumbled to my bed and dropped onto it, pressing my pillow around my ears to shut out the noise of my existence. "Oh God," I cried, "let me sleep. Let me sleep forever and never wake up!" With a deep sob I tried to will myself into oblivion, then welcomed the blackness that came over me.

Light surrounded me as I regained consciousness. I focused on its source:
The figure of a man standing before a cross. "My child," the person asked, "why did you want to come to Me before I am ready to call you?" "Lord, I'm sorry. It's just that... I can't go on. You see how hard it is for me. Look at this awful burden on my back. I simply can't carry it anymore." "But haven't I told you to cast all of your burdens upon me, because I care for you? My yoke is easy, and my burden is light." "I knew You would say that.
But why does mine have to be so heavy?" "My child, everyone in the world has a burden. Perhaps you would like to try a different one?" "I can do that?"
He pointed to several burdens lying at His feet. "You may try any of these."

All of them seemed to be of equal size. But each was labeled with a name.
"There's Joan's," I said. Joan was married to a wealthy businessman. She lived in a sprawling estate and dressed her three daughters in the prettiest designer clothes. Sometimes she drove me to church in her Cadillac when my car was broken. "Let me try that one." How difficult could her burden be? I thought. The Lord removed my burden and placed Joan's on my shoulders. I sank my knees beneath its weight. "Take it off!" I said. ""What makes it so heavy?" "Look inside." I untied the straps and opened the top. Inside was a figure of her Mother-in-law, and when I lifted it out, it began to speak.
"Joan, you'll never be good enough for my son," it began. "He never should have married you. You're a terrible mother to my grandchildren..." I quickly placed the figure back in the pack and withdrew another. It was Donna, Joan's youngest daughter. Her head was bandaged from the surgery that had failed to resolve her epilepsy. A third figure was Joan's brother. Addicted to drugs, he had been convicted of killing a police officer. "I see why her burden is so heavy, Lord. But she's always smiling and helping others. I didn't realize...."

"Would you like to try another?" He asked quietly.

I tested several. Paula's felt heavy: She was raising four small boys without a father. Debra's did too: A childhood of sexual abuse and a marriage of emotional abuse. When I Came to Ruth's burden, I didn't even try. I knew that inside I would find arthritis, old age, a demanding full-time job, and a beloved husband in a nursing home.

"They're all too heavy, Lord" I said. ""Give back my own." As I lifted the familiar load once again, It seemed much lighter than the others. "Lets look inside" He said. I turned away, holding it close. "That's not a good idea,"
I said. "Why?" "There's a lot of junk in there." "Let Me see." The gentle thunder of His voice compelled me. I opened my burden. He pulled out a brick. "Tell me about this one."

"Lord, You know. It's money. I know we don't suffer like people in some countries or even the homeless here in America. But we have no insurance, and when the kids get sick, we can't always take them to the doctor. They've never been to a dentist. And I'm tired of dressing them in hand-me-downs."
"My child, I will supply all of your needs... and your children's. I've given them healthy bodies. I will teach them that expensive clothing doesn't make a person valuable in My sight."

Then He lifted out the figure of a small boy. "And this?" He asked.
"Andrew..." I hung my head, ashamed to call my son a burden. "But, Lord, he's hyperactive. He's not quiet like the other two. He makes me so tired.
He's always getting hurt, and someone is bound to think I abuse him. I yell at him all the time. Someday I may really hurt him...." "My child," He said, "If you trust Me, I will renew your strength, if you allow Me to fill you with My Spirit, I will give you patience."

Then He took some pebbles from my burden.

"Yes, Lord," I said with a sigh. "Those are small. But they're important. I hate my hair. It's thin, and I can't make it look nice. I can't afford to go to the beauty shop. I'm overweight and can't stay on a diet. I hate all my clothes. I hate the way I look!" "My child, people look at your outward appearance, but I look at your heart. By My Spirit you can gain self-control to lose weight. But your beauty should not come from outward appearance.
Instead, it should come from your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in My sight." My burden now seemed lighter than before. "I guess I can handle it now" I said.

"There is more," He said. "Hand Me that last brick." "Oh, You don't have to take that. I can handle it." "My child, give it to Me." Again His voice compelled me. He reached out His hand, and for the first time I saw the ugly wound. "But, Lord, this brick is so awful, so nasty, so.....Lord! What happened to Your hands? They're so scarred!" No longer focused on my burden, I looked for the first time into His face. In His brow were ragged scars-as though someone had pressed thorns into His flesh. "Lord," I whispered. "What happened to You?" His loving eyes reached into my soul. "My child, you know.
Hand Me the brick. It belongs to Me. I bought it." "How?" "With My blood."
"But why, Lord?" "Because I have loved you with an everlasting love. Give it to Me."

I placed the filthy brick into His wounded palm. It contained all the dirt and evil of my life: my pride, my selfishness, the depression that constantly tormented me. He turned to the cross and hurled my brick into the pool of blood at its base. It hardly made a ripple. "Now, My child, you need to go back. I will be with you always. When you are troubled, call to Me and I will help you and show you things you cannot imagine now." "Yes, Lord, I will call on You."

I reached to pick up my burden.

"You may leave that here if you wish. You see all these burdens? They are the ones that others have left at My feet. Joan's, Paula's, Debra's, Ruth's..... As I placed my burden with Him, the light began to fade. Yet I heard Him whisper, "I will never leave you, nor forsake you."

***thanks to my oga for sending this mail(who knows he cld own a blog too)
***I wrote an employment test today(babe is kinda looking for more career prospects), I am wondering why time is never enough for aptitude tests??? anywayz, I am waiting to hear the best from the organization.They berra call me for an interview o!!!
***I will be back with the intended post

Have a nice week! ... I still did not come up with a title!

ciao
dtA

I have a reason

2009-07-20T08:03:00.000-07:00

How was your weekend? fine but short and can't wait for the next one. LOL! I planned on putting up my birthday note to God, sort of, it was more of a thankful note. Instead I decided to put up this destiny's child medley-thankful. This is one of my long time favorite songs(it has always being my ring tone). The song sums up the gratitude to God in my life.

I remember one of the birthday sms I got from a friend, it had a line that read "You are one of the few young ladies God settled quite early, don't ever let the devil give you a reason to be ungrateful, your life is one reason I still know God is fulfills his word".

The sms stirred up worship in my heart, while I grumble and complain and expound on the things I desire God to do in my life, here is someone using me as a point of contact for her own blessings and yet believing God for her own desires.

This taught me to focus more on the things which are not seen for they are the ones that will abide forever, while the things that are seen are temporal and subject to change.

While I whine about my life looking like its on a pause, someone else is getting stirred up to believe God more. I might see no drama in my life, but the truth is, I am not where I used to be. I may face the challenges and desire a change, yet God is saying, I am the best match for the challenges. He's placed so much of value on me, that he can't think of a better person to handle the challenges I face.

Yesterday, I read in Genesis 28:15(NIV), where God told Jacob "I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you" I see this as another depth of God's Love. Inspite of the challenges we may face, he will still be there with us. Jacob did face challenges, some real deep sturves, even sturves he caused by his own self will,yet God says, I will be there with you and won't leave until I am through.

This I hear God saying to every child of His, "I won't leave until I have finished, all I planned for your life". A reassurance saying "it is I who do not sponsor flops, we are in it together and I who has promised, I stand by my promise to perform it, your name is tattooed on my plans, your walls are continually before me, and I know your days before they ever reach you"

In the light of these, I have chosen to remain thankful. Afterall my whining,crying and grumbling has not added an inch to my years or paved a way of solution, instead it has made me more anxious,fearful,irritable,grumpy,depressed, unnecessarily agitated and even reduced my faith in the almighty God.

Life may sometimes not make sense(many times it does not), we might have all those "ish" and "why me" moments, how 'bout those days of "shit happens?" yet in the midst of all this, there's One person that knows our days before they reach us..Ps139. Let's thank him for his ability to take us through those moments.

have a great week!

dtA

***hope you enjoyed the music, courtesy destiny's child

July 13th

2009-07-14T01:58:00.000-07:00

***thanks to everyone that dropped a birthday message, an sms and a mail. I am so grateful, and feel so loved, birthday mate, I hope u enjoyed your day too. Thanks for your sms.
To all the July babies, I say happy birthday, may you spend your days in pleasure and years in prosperity.

July 13th finally arrived ooooo, the day started on a good note with yours truly receiving her July 13th gifts from darling husband, it was accompanied with a big birthday card(the card is so big that I wondered if he starts buying a big and tall birthday cards now, what kind of card will he buy when I am celebrating 50). It also felt good to read a card with "Happy Birthday to my Wife" (see how I have graduated from girlfriend to fiancee to wife).

Sunday night, I was almost certain that the gift was another E71 or another phone atleast, I was complaining that the phone I am using has been keeping sms status as pending and not delivering the sms. Hubby replied and said "don't worry you will soon have a better phone". I think I even dreamt about the new phone sef(lol!)

I woke up on Monday to discover that there was norrin like E71 ooo! or anything that looks like it(he!he!!he!!! not even a remote control to look like a phone).

Hubby ended up buying the gift I planned to get myself....the wristwatch...well it wasn't a bad idea afterall. Right beside it was a cute box that looked like a ring box(In my mind I was like, are we proposing again??? e tun de o!*) .
Seating peacefully inside its box, was this ring with a ruby stone(birthstone for July is ruby). The box included a note, stating what the ruby stone represents.This is one of my best gifts in the world.(Hubby dey do romantic things with this marriage o!) The ring gave me a wow moment!, (not even my engagement ring did that, maybe cos I wasn't expecting this, ). I feel so FLY!!!! with it.

My happy birthday mood faded later in the morning at work, when this sms arrived on my phone from my cousin...."DTA, mummy is dead, why!why!!" .

The sms was it, all the excitement ended, I went to the restroom and I couldn't stop crying. I called her and I just couldn't stop crying too, I couldn't even console her(I'm sure she didn't think of anyone else she could call that moment , that my birthday didn't make any sense to her).

I lost my aunt on my birthday. I remembered one of my birthdays when I was still staying in their house way back in uni, she bought me a Mr Biggs birthday cake, while buying the cake she would never have thought she would die some few years later on this same day...July 13th!!!! How sad.

I just didn't feel the birthday thingy again, her loss is so devastating for everyone in the family. Its so so much a big blow.
Na so all the excitement of July 13th fizzled out ooo!!!!

But what shall we say to these things..."God is still God"

***I will be put up my birthday note to God later this week, so watch this space****

Have a great day!!!

ciao

dTA

*e tun de----You have come again

Countdown to the 13th

2009-07-03T04:46:00.000-07:00

Hey my peeps, thank God its Friday!!!

Yay!!!! July is here, my birthday month, I am actually crazy about my birthday(I dunno why???), I look forward to it(no special reasons, other than its my b-i-r-t-h-d-a-y).

Its countdown to the 13th, well I am not one to hold parties on my birthday, but one thing is sure, I give myself a treat on my birthday no matter how busy I am on that day.

Prior to my birthday, I write a thank you note to God in my journal(this yr the journal is replaced with a blog), a prayer-point and gift ideas(this is for hubby so that he does not "mis-buy"...lol, he is at liberty to choose whichever one he wants from the gift list). The items on the list are like the major stuffs on the TTB List .

The day aint ready until there are new clothes to wear and a birthday present from myself to moi(yes ke!don't ask me why). I am not a fan of surprises, as I am too curious and impatient for surprises, either by hook or crook I must know what is up the sleeves..Let me digress small, I remember asking one of my friends getting married on the morning of her wedding where their honeymoon was(I can be an amebo sometimes) and she said she didn't know, that her husband says its a surprise, in my mind I was like forgerrit, if it is me ooo, I will snoop around,ask questions till I have a clue...lailai in my life will I wait for any surprises. (You can be sure I knew my honeymoon location,booked the hotel sef before the wedding day, no room for surprises + I am too much of a planner to let anything just drop on my laps) .

Back to the birthday gist.
Since, this is first birthday as a Mrs, as usual, the excitement as the day approaches still stays(this includes constant announcement to hubby about countdown to the 13th), I have drawn up my prayer-point/gift ideas, then the thank you note is going to come up on blog-ville(not written that yet, but I have a song already which I will post on my birthday), what's left? Birthday clothes and Birthday present from myself to moi.

I decided to put up a list of my prayer-points/gift ideas, and explain why I want them(I always have an explanation for each gift...lol!). So here we go:

1. Prayer-point: I want all the stress my hubby is getting at work to end,all the harassment and target chasing and ensuring that the organization still makes profit should end. Don't they know he's newly married. (lol!) This work issue is stressing him out, he does not even have his Saturdays in July free, 'cos of work, meetings and networking. They should not allow me to start quoting scriptures for them o. Dear God, you know I don't like when my husband is stressed up, Help his company to do well and make profit for the investors.So we all can be happy Amen!

2. Gift Idea: Vacation- Here I don't mean something elaborate or expensive more like a weekend getaway. This getaway I know will afford the oppopportunity of all a Lady loves, like- a spa treatment( u know). Infact by this weekend getaway, I am not thinking of where we have to travel by an airplane before we can reach there, I want somewhere we can drive to, a resort or something maybe like Ikare camp or akodo beach in Epe Lagos state or Miccom golf course at Ada, Osun state or whispering palms. I am not so sure of this gift though 'cos of the busy weekends hubby is having in July, this maybe postponed to say August or after.

3. Gift idea: A new car- Not like I am crazy about this or its really necessary, infact buying one this year is not exactly in our budget, but you know a new one won't be a bad change from this "thank God" one I am driving. I can pass on this sha!

4. Gift Idea: E71 or Samsung omnia- This is one likely gift I can expect from hubby, considering the fact that I lost my E71 last month, and I have made so much noise about missing the phone. The only thing now is that I am kinda changing my mind about the E71, its all over Lagos(not like Its an issue) but everyone seem to be E71 compliant these days. I was thinking of samsung omnia, though I'm not a fan of samsung, courtesy gsmarena.com, I can see it has features I want in a phone, but I read a review on the phone and I am kinda skeptical about it. We will see sha.

5. Gift idea:Wristwatch- This is most likely present from myself to moi,(If hubby is picking this,then I have to thin k of something else for moi) I love wristwatches, If someone wants to get me a gift and you don't know what exactly, don't crack your brain to hard just buy me a wristwatch:thin strap,metallic strap,small face,large face, named,nameless..I love them all! I am thinking of any of this swatch wristwatches. I hope swatch shop in naija has any of it.

6. Gift Idea: Flat Pumps- I love pumps on casuals, they are so comfy, after rocking heels throughout the week, your feet in a pair of flat pumps.... babe you can never go wrong. This one here is from faith , but I would like to have it in like 2 colors: black and brown(any shade of brown) . This is gift is thrown open to my fanlist. Remember if you are buying this, then buy the two colors...ok?

Not so bad for a birthday gift list abi??? other gift ideas may include, perfumes, jewellries,chocolate(I am watching my weight o!),sweet smelling bath gels etc and of cos birthday wishes.

BTW, remember hubby gave me a gift on his birthday, now I'm thinking what I will buy for him...see me see Jesus! I am planning that I won't give him the gift until a day or 2 after the 13th (when he's probably thinking he's so romantic for giving me a gift on his own birthday....lol!)

****its also going to be my dad's birthday on the 7th and dad-in-law on the 12th********

Alright peeps, do have yourself a great weekend.

ciao

dtA

***TTB-things to buy

fotosearch.com

Marriage Bug

2009-06-29T09:02:00.000-07:00

Hey peeps 'ow was the weekend, well M.J has done his part and moved on. His finished his own part of the script, we are left to continue with the act.How well we play it, is left to us.
Remember, there is a cloud of witnesses, waiting, watching and cheering us up to win the race no matter what obstacles we face.

The gist of the day

I have been bothered lately about the marriage bug I see around, its freaking getting to me and becoming annoying to hubby as he's been saying I should let things be and let people live their lives. Well the bug has kinda bitten two of my friends and I am wondering "what is marriage doing to these babes"

Friend 1

Her marriage is about 6months old, and I have known her most of my life. A couple of months back, they were around to visit us(hubby and I) and you as usual, close friends we got gisting about what she's been up to and blah, blah, blah. Somehow I am used to asking people(especially my close friends) what their next moves career wise is and all that. We got talking and I asked her what's up with her.
She works in one of the state government parastatals(with the state government), and they of 'cos retained her and she's been working there for awhile now.
Curious me, I wanted to know what's happening to another sista, how she was enjoying her job and her goals(as if I'm God abi). She was like, work there is actually boring(of cos it will be for any young person), she gets to work with older people, not so challenging as she would want, the only perk was that she closes early(4pm nothing like working late)...Not a bad idea in lagos. So she was thinking of a change of job to something more challenging, write some professional exams, etc. I was excited about this, then I asked her the question, "so what professional exams are you thinking of?" she was clueless....I was shocked, then she rambled something like her husband suggested doing ican or cibn, though she does not like Accounting and calculations.

I was like,"so why are you thinking of it, babe you read Business Administration in school, and I have known you not to be too keen about figures and calculating(from days of preparing for JAMB) to consider accounting so why follow the path of ICAN". I was shocked at her ramblings. This is a smart babe I am talking about here. I told her about NIM(Insititute of management) and CIPM(insitute of personnel management) and how I think it was so relevant to what she's studied and also very needed these days. She replied and said,"I have heard about it, but never bothered to find out". I was like, "what do you mean?(my mind.....have you stopped using internet? did you stop acquiring information?), this is your field you should know, information is the keyword here, why will you go and put your head and time in something you know its not what you want" and the ramblings continued, "TJ(her hubby) says ICAN is more marketable and every company needs an accountant howbeit small the company can be(true, they need accountable and there are just as many people that don't have ICAN that work as account clerks and accounting officers so?), though I will like something to do in Personnel Management".

I was like so you know what you will like, so why think of ICAN"(In my mind, I wanted to shake her hard and find out, what was happening to her...Is it marriage that is causing all dis).

At this time, I think her hubby started listening to our conversation, then he corroborrated her and said. "Yes, ICAN makes more sense than CIPM or NIM or whatever,In 3 years max, she will be through with ICAN, all she has to do is attend the remedial classes in Lagos and read for it, iCAN or CIBN is more challenging and worthwhile, I answered and said how about CIPM or NIM? \He was like Noooooo!!! "she will now start working late and getting too involved with her job besides HR people are always so rude(says who?, I was too shocked to hear all this coming from a 21st century graduate). I replied and said, "she doesn't even have to work with a company she could float hers and be an HR consultant herself". He was like, "do you know how long it will take for you to get to that stage(I found that response too myopic, and I was disappointed)

I didn't want to push it too far, so I was like, in my own opinion I still think CIPM or NIM makes more sense and its far easier to push you career-wise faster than ICAN/CIBN will do especially considering the person involved.

I didn't want any husband-wife squabbles, so I just let things be, with my hubby winking at me to drop the issue sef.

I was puzzled, 'cos I wondered at the woman she had become, if I was not married, I would have been afraid of getting married seriously, has she been bitten by some weird marriage bug?" How can you be in a field and not know what professional qualifications are relevant, I expect her to be harmed with details of whatever she wants, and even if she was thinking of a different learning curve, she should have valid reasons for it.

I don't have a problem with a couple deciding on what's best for each other, but I believe in individualism and balance. Why will you suffer your spouse the hard way, when you know her capabilities( TJ has CIBN, and I know he knows the rigours involved in these exams, and he works in a new generation bank, I want to believe his reasons for an ican is beyond being marketable, which I believe its even a stupid reason)

Anyhow sha, hubby says I am taking pandol on someone else' headache(dat means its none of my business, but she's still my friend sha, even if she's married)

Friend2

Attended Uni together, roommates throughout, very very close friends. She got married shortly after NYSC and has a son now. Her hubby works as branch manager in one of the naija banks.

Her own marriage bug is Laziness. Shortly after her marriage she put to bed and she's not being doing anything for herself. Her reasons, "she not seen anything she' s interested in"

I was at her place last friday and I found her house littered with nigerian home videos(I even lent some to watch) and magazines. Her son goes to a creche, and she has a maid.
Her daily routine includes going to the gym, dressing up, cooking and dropping and picking up her son from creche, with the rest reading genevieve,true love, city people and watching nolloywood movies. I had expected that she would have started something of her own since her son had started creche, but ore mi says.... she's not thought of what to do. Now, I'm thinking why is the son at a creche, afterall she's not at home.

I was shocked when she said she was not doing anything, nothing at all ooo. No learning a new skill or buying and selling or whatever ooo.

At first, I thought it was their decision(her Mr Man and herself, then maybe it will be ok). She claims her husband has not put any embargo on her not working but that she's just not interested, she does not like the idea of buying and selling and when she travels out of the country she just buys stuffs she needs and thats all.(see me see blessing,21st century babe talking like this...spoilt wife)

I understand that home making is a huge task and deserves all the attention( I didn't see her doing too much of home making sef, she's got a maid, who served me the food and drinks while she didn't move an inch,son is at the creche,she most likely does bulk-cooking so microwave to the rescue,I know i saw a washing machine,so I know she does not wash) but I also believe that a woman should have something to do for herself.(yorubas call it pa-owo-da!)

MY dear friend does notoooo, reason I call her own bug- Laziness. This is someone that contested for Departmental positions and won o!,she's got all the energy in the world you can think of, she organizes end-of-session dinners, class parties etc, very well. I believe she could channel her energy to this area even if she does not want a 9-5 job.She finshed with a grade good enough to get her a job if she wants.

All monies come from her Mr Man, bills are paid by Mr Man including aso-ebis ooo, well maybe he pays her salary at the end of the month for being the perfect home-maker but what if the "what ifs happen?"

She's my very close friend, so I had to talk some sense into her, she's got to get a grip on her life. Do something with herself, she can't afford to be all that for everyone and nothing for herself(me I can talk oooo,especially when you are my friend).Told her about the proverbs 31 woman and how I think she must do something for herself as a woman and do it NOW, and I don't like the idea of her just reeling out stuffs from nolloywood and hot scoops of celebrities in city people. I am wonder how she's not challenged by the success women she reads about in True Love and Genevieve Magazines.

I am also thinking, if her husband is not putting an embargo on her getting something to do, then he should force her to do something with her self, what do you think?

So many women are out there wishing that they had a husband that would encourage them to do something while she is misusing her own opportunity. See Life!

Well, maybe again I am using panadal on someone elses' headache agaun, I rest my case

ciao

dtA

Sneak peek

2009-06-21T10:53:00.000-07:00

***this postwas meant to be published yesterday, but blogger would not just allow.

How are you all doing?

I woke up this morning, with my nose blocked, my throat itching due to a cough. It was those mornings when fatigue, was clearly spelt out in the way my body felt.All I wanted was to stay back under the covers and sleep forever afterall it was a saturday.

Under the covers I had this thought "what if I had a sneak peek of what my next years would be like?" The thought was a good one for me to ponder on and I imagined "how many people out there, would want to have a sneak peek at what their next years from now will look like?"

I closed my eyes and tried to imagine, if I was given the opportunity to peep through the patted curtains of the my next 5years or 10yrs or even 15yrs or betterstill just the keyhole of the door of my next years ahead, what will I see?
A mummy with her twins, with a nicely furnished home, with my garage full of SUVs, sitting atop a blue-chip company/conglomerate being the Margaret Thatcher in charge. Or even running my own consulting firm with the award of best female entreprenure,
Being a successful wife, mother and career woman. With immense Investments. Giving to charities and furtherance of the gospel.

Then Hubby striking a new business contract, with his company's branch networks expanding all over, with his company publicly quoted on the stock exchange, then we own a private beach,manage the first class option of virgin atlantic or british airways while we await delivery of our own private jet, then preparing to send children off to Yale or Princeton or Havard,with all of this my christian walk is still fervent and strong.

How beautiful it would be.I could go on and on...afterall who does not want all the beautiful things life can offer.Then I could call the Mercedes to deliver a customized version of their latest cars maybe a Z-class to my doorstep in 24hrs...lol

Have you ever being curious to want to see and have clear description of what your next life would be like. I know some people seek superficial powers, I am saying just sit down on your couch and let your mind really travel beyond day-dreaming and drift away and wonder what would 10yrs from now look like?

Maybe if we knew what tomorrow or next year or 10yrs or 20yrs would be like maybe we won't cry as much as we do when we are hurt,when people walk out of our lives and ill-treat us,when we lose that job or lose the contract or miss the offer, we won't be offended when someone schemes us out of things, maybe we won't even compete with the next person knowing fully well that our next years holds something far more beautiful than what we see now.

Maybe if I saw my next years ahead, I wouldn't wish to be in someone elses' shoes, or envy the next woman of how she adorns herself'cos I will realize that life is a gift and everyone has their own journey to go through. Maybe...Maybe.

Then Maybe, I will be more thankful for the light afflictions I pass through daily, and the victories I see, maybe I will work harder at going to grad school, maybe save more to afford a Princeton or Yale for my children,invest that my monthly asoebi money, or even be nicer to those I find on the my way up the ladder OR..........

One of the mysteries of life is that, no one knows what tomorrow holds only God does, and that's one of the reasons he is God. We are left to believe the impossible or see the invincible of our next years, the scriptures describes it as "all we ask or think"(Ephesians3:20) that's all we have.

All Joseph saw of his next years, was that his kinfolks would bow before him and he would be the ruler of nations.That was the invincible he saw of his next years, In his journey he was once a prisoner, yet he chose to believe that invincible. Overnight he became the prime minister, next to a Pharoah.

We will never see vividly or have a clear picture of all the next years ahead holds, yes, we will have that desire,dreams and vision, we may even work towards these dreams,acquire degrees,save,plan,scheme etc. We still don't know how exactly it will fall into place.

I know God does not try to negotiate us out of our desires because He's able to do beyond even our desires, he says he is able to give us more than we can imagine. He is the Monarch of the Universe, he does not delight in our misery He created us for his pleasure, so we can watch-out how he makes everyday of our lives unfold before us.

Do you still want to catch a glimpse? If you caught a glimpse what would you do differently?

ciao

dTA

This thing called Submission

2009-06-10T00:10:00.000-07:00

***thanks to every kind word on my last post, well E71 is gone, hoping that I get an E71 gift soon***lol

Today's post

Why is it that anytime the word submission is discussed, it is construed as a feminine trait, and the mention of the word submission suggests weakness immediately. The dictionary meaning of the word submission is kindda negative and derogatory:

As a noun it means "subservience and abasement." As an adjective it means "nonresisting, unassertive, docile, timid, passive and subdued. docile,passive, unassertive etc. I believe this is one of the reasons most men(women inclusive) have misunderstood and abused the attitude of submission

I asked a couple of young married men what they considered as submission from their wives. Their answers baffled me and this is the reason for this post.

Some of the responses from the men:

Man 1: We might deliberate on the issues together. But my word on it is final.
Man 2: Strong-willed and independent women are indications of a non-submissive woman...this shocked me
Man 3: I am the head, she's my assistant

and many unimaginable ones, like "if a woman is given too much education there's a chance she won't be 100% submissive" ...dumb right?

How do I see submission as a woman?

"Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ" (Ephesians5:21).

1. I know God created man and woman, he blessed them and gave them authority to dominate. With Adam and Eve, no one was prescribed superior or inferior. I believe the issue of wives submitting and husbands being the head is basically of roles with neither being of primary or secondary importance. Headship and Submission go hand in hand and should be practiced by both partners who are equal before God.

2. Submission does not in anyway say I am weak, rather it says instead of what I might do naturally and fight you every step of the way, I'm going to show you respect and honor.

3.I wouldn't want to be described as an unassertive and docile wife ,Submission does not mean I will tolerate neglect,passiveness or abuse or even exhibit timidity, rather I share my perspective and I expect my husband to interact and share in my ideas and perspectives,take key decisions together and then I trust him to make the eventual right decisions and still support him while he does what is right.

4. I also believe submission is voluntary and personal. No one should be coerced into it,in order to avoid a very miserable marital life both as the wife or the husband. It should be an attitude/doctrine you apply to yourself.

5. I also say submission is practical, do not endanger your life under the umbrella of submission. Submission does not mean you give up your brain. It does not mean that, if the spouse you are submitting to wants to do something illegal or is physically abusing you, you concede to it. Submission doesn't mean you go along when you're being asked to do something that violates your beliefs, your conscience, or common sense.

This is my take on submission................... just like naijagirl, my views, my perspective.

I am still complying my understanding of submission, I will be back on this topic

ciao!

dtA

I heard something fall....

2009-06-02T01:29:00.000-07:00

This isn't the post I planned, but I really can't help writing about this now, I expect that my writing about it will help me feel better than I feel right now.

It all happened this morning ... what? I lost my phone, I heard something fall, I heard it fall, it fell... You all know I got hubby E71 for his birthday, I couldn't get over loving the gadget. It was all THAT rolled into one.

I desired the phone so much, I decided to get myself one as well. My love for the phone blossomed by day, I discovered I could do so much than I imagined, fiddling with hubby's own.

E71 was IT for me, I made sure I explored all the features ( I wasn't even through with exploring). I was always in awe at the wonders the gadget could perform(so much marketing for the phone). I had the privilege of using my company's Wi-LAN, which meant it was free internet all the way, I enjoyed snooping around blogs on it as well as commenting, I could listen to Internet Radio, Podcasting was easier than I imagined, and so much more. I even installed You-Tube on it yesterday. E71 had much more than what I wanted in a phone.

On my way to work, I heard something fall, wasn't sure it was from me, got to the office and my phone was nowhere to be found, before I knew it, I saw the tear roll down my eyes,(imagining the loss now, my eyes still well up in tears, very funny), I lost my phone due to my carelessness.

It wasn't even 8days old, nothing prepared me for the loss. Why did I have to lose it just when I had become consumed by the power of E71 (sounding materialistic hunnh???).

I kept on saying "I heard something fall" "I heard something fall" , I felt sillier with every "I heard something fall I uttered. Maybe if I had been more careful, and orderly with stuffs in my bag maybe it would have been tucked neatly in my bag(My bag is always not well arranged, God just help me), or if I just checked to be sure, I heard something fall, my E71 would still be here.

Now, I don't have my E71, its probably still in its pouch, safely waiting for someone to hear it ring and pick it up, or probably wondering where Moi is, or even in those dirty gutters in Lagos, I pray someone hears it ring again and pick it up , Just like Pharoah's daughter found baby Moses in the basket at the stream, while he cried.

Let me sign out here, I really expect something to put a smile on my face today, 'cos I am very very upset!

ciao

dtA

***My phone rang throughout the time I called it, but suddenly it has stopped ringing, I'm afraid someone must have picked it up and switched it off or something.

Lord I'm Thankful

2009-05-28T02:26:00.000-07:00

I have been inspired by the different thankful posts I have read: aloted, enkay, writefreak, icequeen, I have decided to count my blessings and name them one by one. This is my own 'D' edition of the thankful post.

1. Divine Gifts(favor, protection, sound health, prosperity, wisdom, peace, joy): God has given me all that pertains unto Life and Godliness, e.g. favor, which covers me like a shield, this has set me apart when all the strong and smart people have hit the targets, it is the extra thing that has made me tops! No wonder He says in the amplified version of the bible, that the 'strongest man does not always win the battle', when God favors a man, there's nothing, absolutely nothing anyone can do. To the other person, favor is just not fair, because it becomes inexplicably how the 'favored man' becomes TOPS.
He has placed men on my path that have fought for my interest even without me paying them a dime or getting a hint about it. God really deserves all the thanks. If I have to talk about instances of the other divine gifts, then I will be having a really long post.

2 December: My favorite time of the year, the excitement that the season brings...the end of another year, the thanksgiving sessions, the plenty food, beautiful decorations, vacations, family reunions etc.
As a child, it was the season for all the new things, new balloon dresses, shoes, hair clips etc. As I grew older, I appreciated December more, for the birth of whom it has come to be associated with, the Savior. The best gift to mankind, God himself in human form...what a glorious mystery!

3. Death and Resurrection of Jesus Christ: I identify with Jesus Christ and I am glad, if Jesus Christ had not died and resurrected, believers would have been of all men most miserable, but I stand today to say I have a God that is alive, he laid down his life and yet He it picked up, for my sake, He made a public show of the devil, defeated him and his angels, so that I might be delivered from the kingdom of darkness and be translated in to kingdom of God. How wouldn't I be thankful?

4. DowntheAisle: Life as DowntheAisle, is one of the most remarkable things that have happened to me. I am constantly inspired by blog-ville, I joined blog-ville after about 1 year of stalking and snooping around. I knew I had a lot in my head I wanted to spill out, I wanted to write about my leap of faith and testimonial journey down the aisle.
I have come to appreciate every blogger's personality, I have become less judgmental of people, I have seen creativity and intellect in display. I have noticed the sincerity from the posts of bloggers. I have come to appreciate the strong people behind the anonymous and non-anonymous faces in blog-ville. Every blogger is a strong person; I have even found myself interceding for fellow bloggers going through stuff...amazing right? Lord I'm thankful, for making me an intercessor.

5. Destiny Helpers: I used to call these people 'haters', until I realized that the attitude/character of this people have pushed me to go on my knees to ask for wisdom in dealing with them. I have seen envy and chauvinism in display, different kinds of office drama and politics, yet it has made me to be more diligent and has brought out that excellent spirit within me. My diligence and hard work appeared to all and gradually I am moving towards achieving purpose, if there were not around or on my path maybe I would have been complacent, and I would have remained on the same level with them. They were meant to be my peers but their attitude never made them realize that they were giving me a push towards success.

6. Darling Husband: People say no one is perfect, but God has given me a man I love perfectly with all his imperfections. Many times I have thought of the men in my yesterday still I cannot trade him for any of them. I have a husband that even when I have had a bad day, the thought of him, makes the difference. The joy of knowing that you have a die-hard supporter, how wouldn't you be thankful to the one that has given the blessing.

7. Dawn and Dusk: the break of a new day is more spiritual to me than physical, it reminds me that there is a miracle in each day. Every circumstance has an expiry date, it all depends on how you want it.

8. Daddy-in-law and family: This might be strange, cos it has to do with my in-laws, I am eternally thankful for my parents too. I can remember I prayed fervently about my in-laws before I got married, what I see with the love my in-laws have shown me is a testimony of what prayers can do. Usually father-in-laws are distant are not very close, but with my daddy-in-law, it is different. He calls me more than he calls his own son. He calls to ask after my welfare and this he has made as a matter of compulsion for every other family member. God, I am thankful for answering this prayer.

9. Daily Devotional: My Rhapsody of Realities, I have read this devotional everyday since 1999, when it was first published. I look forward to every morning cos of my devotional. It has helped me to make meaningful confessions to my Life with a flexible bible reading plan. The messages therein have changed my life. I am thankful for the inspiration given by the Holy-Spirit to the writers.

10. Dstv: Digital satellite, if you live in Nigeria you will agree with me that TV viewing can be boring 'sometimes' with our Nigerian TV stations. Hubby and I always wonder what TV would be like without satellite TV. I love TV a lot, and I am thankful for the initiative to bring digital TV into Nigeria and the initiative that Nigerian TV stations have taken to make sure they are on this satellite bouquet too.

Put up your own thankful post too, I am sure God has done tremendous things in your life too.

ciao

dtA

BUS DRAMA.., Red Shoes and it was HUBBY's Birthday

2009-05-19T03:38:00.000-07:00

Random,random, random, random,(Real Post later dis week)

Wat's gud ard here???

Bus Drama 1

(One of the mornings I woke up late, driving to the office in lagos was a No!No!!, so "bus-ing" was the option. We know these things....Lagos traffic!)

Characters

Conductor(The guy that collects the fare in the bus. Usually very aggressive)

Passenger1 : A woman, age range 35-45

Passenger 2: The good Samaritan Set: Nigeria Kombi-Bus Time: 7.00am

Passenger 1: I greet you brothers and sisters in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord

Conductor: Madam, abeg money

Passenger: you see say I dey "minister" now, let me minister finish.

Conductor: I no disturb you now, give me my money and continue your ministration, na so dem dey do am

Passenger: This man, I am ministering, respect my ministration

Conductor:Pay me my money, and continue, your others wey dey "preash" for inside bus dey always hold their money before they start, abeg no embarrass yaself, pay me my money

( All the while, the ministration has not gone beyond "I greet you brothers and sisters in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord, the rest of the ministration was arguments on paying while she continues ministering, yet the woman insisted she was still ministering)

Moi was cracking up already,he!he!!he!!!he!!!! which one be dis o!!!! madam pay and let's enjoy your ministration joo!!!(In my thots anyway)

Passenger 2(the good samaritan): Ok! Ok!!, i will pay for her how much is it? Passenger 2 pays the fare. Thank God!!!

Passenger 1: Take your money joo, and bring change ooo, and bring the change now! now!!!! na only mouth you get!!!!

Moral: God does not sponsor flops, and he cannot be mocked, if you want to preach or do your "ministration" on the bus, then hold your fare simple!!!!!!!!

Do you think she really planned to preach on the bus, or she just "scoped?" you never can tell in Lagos!!!!
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The Stingy Guy + Red Shoes

There is this gist I heard about a guy that loves red shoes, infact rocks RED shoes not RED trainers oooo,or Red Running shoes ooo, or or I mean RED Dress( or is it trouser I'ld call it now)SHOE,,,,, SHOEEEE and equally very very very stingy.
The particular guy in the gist is so stingy that when he gives his colleagues a lift home, in his car he charges for transport fare, and even offers change if necessary, oh, you could say that he's making extra income right? How about he's refusal to use his car A.C, because he wants to conserve gas.????? with all the heat in Lagos and a functional A.C ooo what is he conserving for, as I heard the A.C is never used?
His stinginess has rubbed off on the wife, such that they hardly spend more than 30seconds on the phone, with the rest being "flashing", If he'ld be picking his wife, that represents "flashing" twice, if the wife would not be ready at the time, then she has to flash back once, if she's ready she flashes back twice as well.This technique I heard they have practiced so well, that they never make mistakes.
If you want to know, he is a young Engineer,works in a well paying construction firm, at least good enough for him to afford phone recharge cards even as little as 100naira.
Then his love for red shoes I can't explain, what stinginess has to do with red shoes ask my colleague who gave me this gist, he claims that all lovers of red shoes are stinginess. Heard anything like this before????

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The Guy with the Long Nails

Saw this in church, and it is so disgusting, I wish I could take pictures and post. I wonder why a guy would have the two index fingernails on his hand as long as 1.5-2inches(no exaggerations). It looked very very ugly. Long fingernails are No! No!! for a guy. What is he doing with them, I'm curious.

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....And it was hubby's birthday

It was hubby's birthday yesterday, moi called in that I had an appointment at the clinic(nothing was wrong with me oooo, just wanted to laze around the house, not like there was a party anyway, and I know some dumb people in my office will start guessing rubbish, for that word "clinic").
It was his 1st birthday as a married man(well most of his birthday sms referred to the fact). Prior to ystday, I cracked my brain for what gift to get him and I didn't have strength for tobenna wife's style, or maybe I just procastinated and before I knew it the birthday was here. I knew Hubby had been contemplating on changing his 2nd phone, I finally decided on buying the phone and making it the birthday gift(**I feel like someone that can buy expensive gift abi? of cos, it cost me some money ooo, which means no new something next month! but anything for bros u know!). Got him a nokia E71,(very cool phone, I'm loving it too), switched his sim card to the new phone by midnight, put his ringtone from the old phone, transferred his contacts before he woke up,and even put my picture as the wallpaper on the E71(lol!)

He was surprised when his phone rang by his bedside, lo and behold it was an E71 alerting him of the call, isn't that cool!!!. Wrote him a love letter as well,(I can do love things atimes) , no emails, no texts, in my own handwriting with pen and paper... and of cos had dinner out, inclusive of one hot pepper-soup that almost peeled my tongue, I won't forget that in a long time... so, hubby's birthday has come and gone, I raised the stakes for my own birthday in July, I trust him to perform(lol...I like good things, who does not).

He still has not gotten over the gift I gave him. He's in love with the new gadget!!!!

Guess this is enough for a random post

***I should add, bros had a gift for me too, an H&C shirt, which I am rocking today( bros can overdo sometimes sef!)

ciao

dtA!!!

Celebrating Our Differences

2009-05-05T08:46:00.000-07:00

I really have a problem on starting my posts, I'm going to start anyway....

Ever heard of Love is Blind; Marriage is the eye-opener... how true???

Right now I am believing this words. There's a learning curve to marriage.No wonder, it is defined as an institution, you don't just stumble into it it is to be approached with the right mindset....(enough of the preamble)

One of the Lessons Learnt in 2months

I have noticed in my 2months and 14days of Marriage the differences that exist between hubby and moi.
It is very interesting how this whole Love thing wires together two adults who are from different upbringing,beliefs, sometimes religion etc and bundles them together into a life of happily ever after(depending on the options they choose). They are left to figure out how this differences will impact into their journey as married people.

In our marriage, I have come to appreciate the maturity, hubby and I have dealt with our differences such that in recent times, I thought, I would have found us extremely boring if we always had the same opinions and views on issues. (It is not like this differences never existed before marriage, sometimes they are occasional or you choose to ignore them especially if they are not major show stoppers). We have learnt to value each persons opinion without being judgmental, abusive and the likes.

It is also interesting to note, when I see older marriages that have withstood all the issues of marriage how they have grown to think alike and do things alike, that gives me the confidence that the differences that exists or ever existed are supposed to fade out gradually as the intimacy in your marriage grows not by nagging, comparing or trying to change the other person.

This same differences has been one of the little foxes through which many marriages and homes have been destroyed simply because parties involved want a superstar- spouse overnight which never happens. I have seen in my over 20yrs on earth(I'm old small..lol!) that it is absolutely difficult to change a human being; an attempt at it produces either a weakling or a terrorist/dictator.
Either parties become competitors, and begin a rat-race in their home, always looking out for who is right or wrong....(what a wasted effort!).

In 2 months I have become- a better person,more thankful to God for the man he blessed me with, a good listener and appreciative of personalities. Now, I can say marriage is not for boys but for men likewise not for girls but for women.

There is no competition in Marriage. "You have always done things a particular way does not make it right and neither is it wrong; Some other people do it in different ways and achieve same results". This does not make either parties a superstar or a dunce; rather both parties should strive to ensure they are the winning team in their home and marriage...no controversy! irrespective of who gets it right. This way, the energy to achieve success and build each other up is channeled in the right direction. Remember .."As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another" (Prov. 27:17)

Decode your sleeping style

2009-04-23T04:16:00.000-07:00

Hiya! saw this on the internet and couldn't help but share it. All the married in the house...raise ur hands up! you will relate with this more... well I did. I was thinking what has sleeping style got to do with this thing called marriage. Well here we go, decode ur sleeping style.

1. The football: Both on your sides facing each other with one foot touching, i be like say u dey play football for inside ur sleep(lol!)

What it means: Footballers do not need 24/7 TLC to feel close. You both have jam-packed schedules…and love it! Sure, you don’t spend as much quality time with each other as you’d like, but that single touch in ur sleep makes those moments cherishable. So make u dey score goal dey go!

2. Classic Spoon: Full front-to-back contact, with one person tucked into the other; you know…holding ur "property" tightly such that no midnight thief go fit thief am for night.

What it means:Lying like this shows you have a pure outlook on your marriage and you take on more traditional roles. The person on the outside likes to feel as if they can shield your marriage from problems, while the person on the inside is sensitive. Classic Spooners are supportive and never go to bed angry(I like this one)

3. TetherBall*: One of you on your back with a single hand on the other person, more like "if you move an inch I go catch you"

What it means: You’re independent but also willing to compromise. You disagree on politics, religion, how the toilet seat should be left and everything disagreeable that language can qualify , but love finding common ground as a couple.

4. Cliff Hangers: Sleeping on opposite sides of the bed with your backs to each other ( I think the size of the bed will also encourage this)

What it means:Getting shut-eye in this position can simply mean you’re practical (hey, there’s plenty of room in that big bed) and like your leg room, but it may signal a bit of distance in your relationship. You’re total opposites, but you also truly appreciate all of each other’s differences—and personal space.

* A tetherball is is a game for two opposing players. The equipment consists of a 10 ft (3 m), stationary metal pole, from which is hung a ball from a rope, or tether. The two players stand on opposite sides of the pole. Each player tries to hit the ball one way; one clockwise, and one counterclockwise. The game ends when one player manages to wind the ball all the way around the pole so that it is stopped by the rope.

Faffing!

2009-04-16T07:24:00.000-07:00

I stumbled on this stuff on one of Lady A's old's post and just tried it out.

Interestingly, I have my picture on a magazine cover, I don attain magazine celebrity status by force, like jenifa "mo ti arrive"... lol

On the cover is a picture of moi and hubby on our wedding day.

Try it out, magmypic, if you are in the faffing mode like me.

ciao

Happy Easter!

2009-04-14T00:36:00.000-07:00

I am the reason for Easter, Jesus laid down his Life,
and picked it up again
so that I can become the begotten of the Father.
Death could not hold him captive,
the cross wasn't easy but the gift was well worth it.
If it was only I on the surface of the earth,
he would still have laid down his life.
Now, the chains are broken, the ransom is paid,
I am free!

I am checking my calender again for the next holidays(lazy me!) Holidays are sweet!. Wifely roles had me doing cooking, shopping, and cleaning. My shopping bags looked like I had bought the whole of Lagos and I was going to cook for the whole of Lagos (lol). I cooked and cleaned, so much that I gave up the idea of fixing my nails this weekend. How could I, with all my Maggi Kitchen cooking.

Thankfully, hubby was at home, Mr Man was just busy eating and sleeping, if he was awake, he was either eating something or warming something to eat, while moi slept like I was in an Olympic sleeping competition.

Sunday got me receiving remarks on how good looking and fresh hubby and I was, and black skinned hubby was blushing at the remarks(lol). I was really feeling cool o! ( I was more like...u can say that again *wink wink* after all he's married) that means all my maggi kitchen is really working abi.

PHCN showed themselves plenty, we were on generator throughout,(na naija we dey!) we contributed so much to the sales of the petrol stations this holiday. DSTV is one of the best things that happened to Television in naija, and my post will be incomplete without my romance with yoruba nollywood movies. They were a cool comic relief for the holidays.

Did I enjoy the holidays, Yes; was it a short one, YES! YES!!, lazy moi have to restore wake-up mode to 5:00am. I wish the holidays will continue joo, say like 7days; after all the passion week of Jesus was 7days!(Lazy girl)

Have to rush back to my work, I'll be back!

ciao

I am getting more wedding IVs and announcements and doing free consultants for all my friends who are the next brides. I will be starting another naija wedding resource blog soon, it will be an opportunity to put an expression to my love for weddings.

Life as a Mrs...

2009-03-30T09:03:00.000-07:00

Its about a 1month and 10days I got married, how has it been?

Hubby and I: Hubby and I are a lot closer( I can say a lot closer than when we were single), we seem to have a lot to talk and laugh about these days, there is always one gist or gossip or joke to chat about. Our gists extend late into the night until the other person sleeps off.

Hubby seem to be more responsible(he!he!! he!!!not like he wasn't before anyway). He checks on me many times in a day with phone calls at several intervals, ensures that the car is fine for the road and there is fuel in the car( moi can assume on fuel many times), that I have cash in my bag and not depending on some ATM, he has really entered into the husband role thing!

Moi is gradually becoming like old man's wife(I pray not sha! lol), I worry unnecessarily, I worry when hubby wants to go out at night to pick up something for the house,I worry about the neighbourhood we stay and the funny looking guys around, I worry when the pumping machine is not working and we have not stored enough water( I pray we get a new flat soon and soon), I worry when the gate is left open ajar by other tenants in the building( I already suggested that the gate be locked with padlock with every entrance not just loosely closed , and when you need to enter, call your family member to come and open for you).
I hope my own government will not be hard sha!

Cooking hasn't been too much stress, Hubby is not picky about food and does not mind freezer meals, which is kinda good for me(lol!), though I ensure that we eat "correct" meals at weekend, correct soups and stews(dat one old man's wife taught me well). My weekends start with going to the market to buy fresh meat,vegetables and pepper inorder to do bulk cooking for the week, while hubby and I clean the house and watch movies or just gist and laugh.

These bulk meals are for the week which means all you need for dinner between Monday and Friday is just a microwave(microwave wife u'ld say). Sunday evenings are meant for driving around town or catching a movie at the cinema for the fun of it not like we really need to watch the movie( I hope we will have time to do this for long)

Decision Making: Decisions are jointly taken, One of the first decisions we took was as regards our career goals, this had to do with me; school or change of job/workplace. This would have been easy if I was not married, but with marriage hubby has to be considered and consulted. I was almost thinking I was loosing myself to marriage and all that came with it.

Well, I am going back to school for my MBA( full time study) which means I will be resigning from my workplace soon.

Dressing Up: I have tried to hype up my dressing a little bit(well i think so), for my house clothes I tried to make a few trendy kaftans made for me with spaghetti straps.(those kaftans can be very comfortable) got some shorts and capri pants with singlet tops to wear around the house too ( I have to ensure that I am still a babe abi?).I have joined a gym, which I have only attended twice, ( I will get serious with it after easter!) I hope I can still do all this babe things after the babies come( I am really scared of what childbirth does to women's bodies...lol maybe I am crazy sef).

Friends: The first question they ask " how has it been? give me gist now", they want to see the ring, they ask about Mr. hubby, etc, for those about to walk down the same aisle, they want to know who did what at my wedding. Others that couldn't make it to the wedding, are like "congrats, I am so sorry I didn't make your wedding, I had to be a work, I hope you had a great time" (what do they expect??) and some accusations " I heard about your wedding, you didn't invite us anyway congrats"(this will usually come in an sms) .
The really close friends, ask "how was the first night? give me gist"(like its their business. lol)

Workplace: Most common greeting, is "madam, how is oga?" automatically,I have graduated from chic to madam, how funny.
Everyone, sees me as having everything just because there is oga somewhere, they go like"You don't have a problem afterall, oga is there for you now"(how myopic).
The most annoyingly of comments I hear at work these days whenever I decide to be quiet and keep to myself... "is it morning sickness" and when I was chewing gum sometimes a colleague was like" why are you chewing gum in the morning...na wa o!" (I am like duhhh...!, does it happen like that.)

Church: The ushers, would almost fall over themselves to ensure that we sit close to each other, and would almost unseat other members of the congregation to do that. One of the assistant pastors was even like," why don't you guys wear "anko""(same clothes???).

On mother's day, I was welcomed into the women's fellowship of the church. I almost passed out when I was called on stage into the waiting arms of the women's fellowship members.
Sermon on mother's day was obviously for women, and somehow I felt the female preacher(head pastor's wife) was preaching at me(lol) cos her gaze was on me continually, see me see something(hubby even noticed),like she had always wanted to counsel me or something. She kept on repeating the roles of wife in the home. "A wife is...., a wife is....., " she even called sex-ministration. shuo!

Anywayz, I can say I am enjoying married life, it is not as serious and stereotyped as I thought or expected(maybe its too early to say), God has been helping me though.

Old man and his wife miss me, I miss them too( I will be seeing them this weekend), my In-laws have been great(maybe until they realize babies are not coming till next year...lol), father-in-law calls me like everyday to check after my welfare.
My home(I can say dat again) is peaceful and we are happy even though there is still a lot we hope to accomplish just like any new couple.
God has really been faithful, and in this I am glad.

ciao

Tips for your wedding day!

2009-03-21T07:01:00.000-07:00

Tips for your wedding day!

* Pray concerning order and glory of God at your wedding. There was order at my wedding I still see people that attended my wedding that remark it was a well organized wedding. Infact one of my friends said it was evident that there was the glory of God at my wedding. No one struggled for food or drinks or space, not because there was only surplus it was just ministering angels ensuring that there was order. The truth is this, the hall we used couldn't accommodate the large turn out of our guests yet it was not rowdy!
* smile, smile and smile. I glad I smiled well for all my pictures and the pictures I didn't smile I didn't like them...
* Don' t be upset when a friend you believed would be at your wedding suddenly calls to say she won't be making your wedding: I got the same calls, infact a friend sent me an sms that she won't be coming because she can't make it 'cos she's never traveled out of Lagos before...ridiculous! just enjoy your day with or without any friend. The ones that can make it will come and will rock your wedding with you. You can bet you won't notice they were not there.
*Eat your wedding food...don't be like me, I didnt taste any of my wedding food and when I see the videos and how nice the food looks... it hurts!
*Make sure you like every bit of what you are wearing on your wedding, same thing applies to your wedding programme. Don't wear a bogus jewellry simply because "mummy" wants you to wear. wear what you like and be sure you are comfortable with whatever you are putting on yourself, lipgloss, hair piece, eye shadow, bracelet, jewellry.
as to wedding programme same applies!
*Put each of your friends in charge of something to co-ordinate on your wedding day. A friend should handle your own share of the wedding cake, another should see to it that your favorite song is available when you want to dance to it, etc.

More tips to come!

More gist

2009-03-21T07:00:00.000-07:00

I am very lazy to continue gist on how the wedding day went, I have tried to summarize it though!

Dressing up: madam makeup arrived early, thankfully, the house was full and the arrival one a cousin or a family friend brought so much excitement and of course, the usual iyawo! iyawo!! everywhere I turn to . Had my bath early, received calls and sms from friends who wouldn't be attending , my hairdresser also arrived early so started with making the hair while I received several congratulatory phone calls. didn't have breakfast i wonder why? had a drink instead and a large piece from my engagement cake. Wedding gift from my hubby was delivered via fedex, I was tripped when I learnt there was a fedex dispatch rider waiting with a parcel for me, I was shocked...who could it be??? na hubby o! a lovely Victoria secret set!!!! this bros can do romantic things small small too....
Everyone was around to help with wearing my wedding dress, even old man's wife. Jack Robinson, I was dressed up, looking angelic and bridish... na so o!, photo sessions started before leaving for church. Entered old man's new car, the car he had planned would not be used until yours truly's wedding.

Church: Got to church at like 15mins before and hubby was no where to be found. He was running late, the last time I spoke with him he was like he was dressed and ready to leave the hotel and hopefully should be in church 30mins before service starts but here we dey waiting for mr. hubby o! then the phone calls started flying " where are you... where are you" bros no show o! usual me I got really impatient! its good to have correct and calm people around you... they did wonders trying to calm me down with the different cracking of jokes but i don they vex... and boil at over 100degrees but i dey laugh small small! 11:00am bros still never arrive, surprisingly usual old man no even dey upset he was also calming me down...its good to be a bride o!..lol. hubby's family was in church, his dad and mum, everyone,nibo lo wa? nibo lo wa? was the question on everyone's lips.

You want to know what was on my mind?..... ( you can't imagine, then I thought or was the gift a sign? lol!)

11:17am( I checked the time) my king arrived, looking sharp, smart and hot!*wink wink* no one could harass him! everyone was thankful he arrived finally. service started, learnt later that the pastor asked him to apologize before the congregation....why was he late? he was delayed by two of his groomsmen( u don't want to know where they went to that morning)

Service: exchange of vows, exchange of rings, the kiss( really hot! I no even send sef, relaxed to kiss my king jare!). Just like O'Dee said, all the anxiety will disappear after the first kiss...very true.
Fastforward to signing of marriage register, then the sermon very very long... Hubby and I was wondering if the pastor forgot there was a reception after wards...all those babas sef they sabi to overdo sometimes!. Service ended, took the usual photos after church service(which i frowned in ...) I was pissed that the service was too long and the photographers still wanted to waste time during the photo sessions.

Reception: Arrived the reception venue in good time, no traffic in Ibadan, we sat in the car, while we wait for the bride and groom's entrance our friends came around to say hi. That was the first opportunity we had to exchange pleasantries with our friends.

we were called in, danced, danced and danced! hubby was also busy doing his own dancing thing! (from the videos it looked like he was doing break dance!). The usual reception dramas, throwing of the bouquet( come and see the struggle babes meant this thing called marriage o! na something o!) One of my friends had bribed me earlier in the morning to ensure that I throw the bouquet to her, during this period she kept on winking at me not to forget our supposed deal. Had a great time! Left the reception venue for the hotel to change into our after party clothes.

After Party: All the oldies had left, it was the party for the "youngies???" another round of partying. This time we had the opportunity to sit with our friends and relax. I was glad I didn't leave for Lagos that day for hubby's family house. The after party gave us the opportunity to enjoy our own wedding with our friends. Lots to eat and drink. but interestingly, I was just drinking without eating( I didn't taste anything from my wedding food and it is still paining me till today). Left the after party venue about 7p.m.

I was received into hubby's family with prayers and the traditional washing of feet . We left for our hotel room shortly after this.... and leave the rest of the story for us! Changed into my Victoria secret gift, the rest of the night.... beautiful it was worth the waiting!

ciao!

Part 2

2009-03-10T01:53:00.000-07:00

Madam Makeup finally arrived at about 11:45am, out of the wherever she disappeared to, apparently she forgot her phone at home so went to get it, she claimed she told me she wanted to pick something at home and I responded with a "no problem" when she was leaving ( I can't remember though! na naija we dey?). We had to get work as quickly as possible, I didn't even spark for her I wonder why? being "bride-ish" you'll say? Of course all the ladies were on her neck to deliver or "eat" her up!

12:00 Makeup had started, plenty suggestions from different corners,"apply more eye-shadow", "use a bronzer" "is that the way you apply your powder" etc etc. Our supposed makeup studio had plenty mistresses thank God it all turned out perfect!
the photographers were another sight to behold, " bride give me a smile", "another one bride", "that's a beautiful one".... all the jibes went on and on!

We finished makeup/dressing up at about 1:30pm,and I was finally subjected to another round of photo-shoot( No wonder we had 1500exposures) while Madam Makeup paid for her lateness by tying geles for about 6people with no kobo charged! after she had made mouth she does not tie free geles.

Left the house at about 2pm when OM's wife was almost freaking out( she's got plenty hot blood) on the phone expecting me to have arrived at the venue(engagement did not start until 1.30pm). Arrived at the venue,shortly after and had to wait in the car for about 30-45mins before I was called in. Apparently, hubby to be was also inside, locked somewhere in one of the halls taking his own photo shoot sessions. He was eager to see me,as he kept sending emissaries to check me out and bring me to where he was, but No way! na money dem dey use unveil bride(lol!). I was also eager to see him too anyway.

He was called in shortly before I was called in,I caught a glimpse of him surrounded by his friends in white and turquoise blue fila,( I broke into a smile, when I saw the beauty of their combo) me sef, I get taste small.

Na my turn next, all my "owambe" friends were ready as usual.As the bride now, I had to step out in my queenly regalia,taking my steps cautiously and majestically, then owambe friends refused to move forward ooo! by popular demand,they wanted yinka ayefele tracks. "see me see something" Here I was standing and dressed in my queenly armour( well known for the heat it produces) and face covered while some owambe chics were still battling with songs...won serious

Eventually, the guy gave them what they wanted. Those babes can dance, they kept on doing "to the back... to the front moves", then "e ko mo le" (bend down) moves. They made sure I danced. While I would dance with all my efforts(I think), someone will whisper again and say I was not dancing well o, then I will ko mo le again( reason why my legs ached for 3days after). Fortunately, we made it to the front, with the way their "to the back.. to the front" was going I didn't think we will finish the dance that day.

Ceremony Begins,

Usual stuffs, go to your parents for blessings, tell them thank you, take pictures sitting in their middle, give daddy a peck,give mummy a peck and wave goodbye.

then, go to the grooms family, dancing o! with your face covered, while they open it with money and then receive their blessings.
I can't remember at what point the groom will carry the bride, but I know he did( I didn't want him to carry me though, 'cos i didnt want him to "disarrange" me) anyway he carried me and dropped me on his mum's lap with heavy breathing and panting( I weigh 70kg) so that was some work for him. After that, the alaga ijoko, said he should carry me again!!! how far Ma? we refused o!. You wan kill the lepa boy!(lol).

The ceremony continued, lil sis was called to read the conjugal letter, which was unnecessarily long, beautifully crafted though but long... ki lo de. Na so them call lil sis o! she come start her own dancing, "ki lo de" ijo yii po (this dance is too much). If only she knew the letter she was going to read was long she would have saved her energy during the dancing.

I was asked to select my favorite item,"good girl" like me, I picked the bible,...how sweet!(duhhh!!! what would I have picked before? yams? lol). Exchanged rings, kissed each other, with bros turning it into something else. The kiss was long "how far bros?"

The Highpoint of the ceremony for me was the handing over part, that was emotional, I saw tears toll down my dad's face and that was precious to me. They were to hold my hands and pray for me, while they handed me over to hubby's parents who are supposed to be my new parents while they hand me over to their son.It was a beautiful time. After the handing over to hubby, Mum-in-law just came to give us a hug and held us tight for some seconds and I saw tears rolled down her face too. Those were beautiful times. The woman was joyful, it was very obvious.

The ceremony ended,(posting some shots from the day in the next post) plenty greetings, chatting, eating, gisting etc.

6:30pm: I was at home already, plenty gist about everything, most especially the long kiss, then I got a call from the pastor of the church(baptist church-OM's church) to bring my dress for inspection... the last thing I wanted to do.

7:00pm, OM was furious about the inspection thing, though we've been told during the counseling classes we didn't think it was that serious and mandatory. Well OM took me to the pastor's house, Had to carry the dress ooo, this one no be joke, went to the pastor's house, unfortunately for him and fortunately for me, OM was with me, someone he didn't expect will come with me so he could harass me well, i'm sure. the pastor was shocked to see OM cos he kept on saying " Daddy you wouldn't have bothered" amazingly he didn't inspect anything ooo, he said he will like to sanctify it which he did in about 15secs, before he could say, "see you tomorrow" we had zoomed off!.

7:30pm, Got home after the sanctification and saw one of my "test-writing" BM was around, it was at that point I remembered that they sent me an sms in the morning saying they won't be on the train. She was like her test was for 3pm, so she will leave immediately after the church service. That was still not a bad idea abi?

I settled to make my hair(fix weavon), lil sis figured out we could use one of our family friends we thought would be busy for other things during the event(reason we didnt include her on the train initially)the chic tried on the dress, luckily it wasn't small for her, all we needed was to use OM's wife sewing machine and the tailor to make necessary adjustments. and pronto! she was in... no sweat!

How the day ended

Learnt dance steps by force with high heels on, by fire by force I learnt "e ko mole",lots of suya and asun was chattered into the house,plenty to eat and drink, spent the evening laughing, dancing, eating suya and asun, of course gossiping about other friends and people's relationships and all sorts and how could I have forgotten...watching jenifa! (mo like combinason re?). It was a good time to catch up on gists and live the moment...( a replica of unilag days I might not have this flavor of blast, in a long time to come)

When I checked the time it was about 5am,everyone was fast asleep with the TV still on, and suya wraps everywhere ( still can't remember when we all slept off!)....

ciao

see pictures in the next post! then post on how the wedding day went by!

The Traditional Ceremony- Part 1

2009-03-07T12:03:00.000-08:00

A traditional wedding is a common type of wedding in Nigeria, depending on the race and culture the mode of the traditional wedding varies. Amongst the yorubas in recent times, the traditional wedding usually takes place a day before the civil/religious ceremonies. This would usually come up after the two families have met and have agreed to have their children marry each other. The traditional ceremony is the Yoruba way of simply saying that "I am giving my daughter to you as a wife to your son" while the man’s family comes with gifts which are specific traditional/cultural significance. In modern times, different modes of this ceremony have been introduced. This is a brief description of what we did on the 20^th of February. Here are the details how the events went by:

1.30am: Stalking blog Ville, the whole house was asleep, I was busy doing the one thing I’m crazy about…blog Ville

5:30am: Bloody blog Ville stalker was awake, quite early for someone that slept at about 2:00am, woke up lil sis, we had planned to spend some minutes in the morning to do the prayer of agreement thing. That lasted about 15mins. A text arrived on my phone; two of my Bridesmaid wouldn’t be available again. They will be writing a test in school on Saturday (Both final yr students, so they need every score they can get). Surprisingly I was not bothered.I didn't even remember again until I saw them on Friday night. I looked into the mirror, and I saw a big pimple on my cheeks (The photographer did a good job of covering it up)

6:00am: Had my bath, took my time to relish my time alone (I knew I wouldn’t get that again for a long time to come). Just as I was coming out of the bathroom, got a call from my boss to wish me a happy married life(very thoughtful of him) and he was keen on knowing if I had practiced dance steps ‘cos he wanted my to out-dance hubby (I think I did after all..lol!). Old man walked in just about when I was on the phone, he wanted us to pray together, the prayer was very, very long. (I was wondering if we were going to pray the whole day)

7:30 am: Another call again, this time it was hubby to be, he was parked outside waiting to see me, I was hunhh “ ki lo sele” , He really didn’t have a reason to come that early, funnily he came to drop the pearl jewelry gift set his mum(now mum-in-law)awwwhhh!!!. I still think that could have waited, he just wanted to see my face jare!

Old man’s wife wanted us to pray together, that session was very emotional for to two of us. We sobbed throughout the sessions. Old man’s wife prayers were deep. See extracts below:

Ile yin yo kun fun idunu ati ayo! ( your home will be filled with joy and happiness)

Emi Olorun yoo ba yin gbe! ( God’s spirit will tabernacle with you)

Eni eleni o ni gba ise yin se! ( No one will take your place/ responsibilities)

O ni ri alatako ( No one will be against you)

Olorun a ko ile ayo fun e (God will build for you a happy home)

O ni fi oju sunkun omo (You will not cry over any child)…she knows what she’s saying

Olorun yoo fun e ni ogbon lati se iyawo, oko re( God will give u d wisdom to be d wife for ur husband)

Ife re yoo wa ni okan oko re ni gbogbo igab( Your love will continually be on your husband’s heart)

Olorun yoo fi a ye gba e( God will bring you to a large place)

And so on and so forth.

8:00am: 3 of my friends arrived from Lagos, excitement, gisting, lots of laughter and everything in that class. They were set for work seriously. One of my friends offered to go with Old man’s wife to the engagement to see wasap with the arrangements. I sent the other two to the bank to get some cash( Its good to be a bride, everyone would wait on you!).Got a call from old man’s wife, she was furious that the décor guy had not started work at the engagement venue, instead he was at the reception venue about to start work for the next day event( the two venues are opposite each other). O’M’s wife was very furious she called my phone to complain about my “almighty décor guy” and while she was on the phone with me, she was busy lamblasting the guy and she forgot I was still on the phone.( I discovered O’M’s wife finished the guy seriously with her mouth)

Had to give him a call, and he reassured the décor will be completed before the event slated for 12noon was going to start. Thank God he delivered sha!

9:00am: One of OM’s wife friends came around to the house to pray for me again( Prayer Rain!!!). She prophesied twins! Twins!! And twins!!! See me see something o!( the woman has two sets of twins, I get where she’s coming from)

Makeup Madam arrives, with all her color gadgets, very prompt you will say abi? Asked her to settle in and get all her stuffs ready while I grab something to eat.

Called the décor guy again, he had started work at the venue, the engagement cake was ready and would be set before start of events, the photographers/videographers were also on their way everything was fitting into plan.

9:30am: Other BMs arrived, in a twinkle of an eye everywhere was littered with bags, underwear, shoes, dresses, makeup with plenty gists about weddings etc. One of the BMs was yet to fit her dress so she was trying it out. Shockingly, the dress refused to enter her. Everyone was alarmed, “ki lo sele” there was drama everywhere, we needed a tailor to fix the dress asap, got a tailor few minutes later, remembered that OM’s wife had an old sewing machine, voila! The girl started working… long and short, the dress was fixed!

Madam Makeup, saw the pimple, advised to put ice-cube on it.In all of these I was still very calm!

10:00am; Madam makeup was no where to be found, she had disappeared all her color gadgets were still lying where she settled in. Her phone was not going through, her car definitely was no where to be found. Everyone wondered where she was! Photographers/videographers had arrived. Dressing up was meant to start by 11:30pm. We decided to relax and wait for her to arrive in her queenly majesty while we continued in our gisting and chatting rendevouz. This continued till about 11:05 when we discovered she had still not arrived. Her phone was still not going through. OM and his wife had started dressing up since the event was to start by 12. Called Hubby to be and he said he was getting dressed already, OM started hurrying everyone up in his usual manner, still Madam makeup was no where to be found!

11:30am; Madam Makeup had still not arrived o! her phone was still off, I was getting vexed, all the calmness I had all day was melting off gradually, I was meant to dress up and be at the venue by 12:30/1pm. ( Thank God the event didn’t start until 1p.m.)

We kept on calling and calling, she was nowhere to be found…..I had lost my patience……So what happened?????? To be continued in part 2

Now Mrs.!

2009-03-04T05:10:00.000-08:00

I'm back to blog-family, I really missed this family. I didn't go on honeymoon with my laptop and I'm usually not comfortable blogging on someone else's computer.To reduce long tori I missed blogville sha o! I kept on disturbing "my king"(changed his name from sd) on how much I was missing blogville (he thinks its just some girlish drama).
Thanks to everyone that dropped comments,ur wishes touched my heart. I'm sure everyone is waiting for details. Trust me to give you every detail of the events.

Peeps i rocked my wedding o! I enjoyed myself pa!, i enjoyed it so much that I wanted to have it with all the excitement all over again.

I will definitely be back, I am busy with posting comments,stalking blogs, blog awards and just feeling blogville generally.

I will be back....

ciao

2 days to go!

2009-02-18T13:46:00.000-08:00

I'm wondering what I am still doing awake, its about 12:55am and none of my eye-lids are falling in love. I am wide awake and active. My creeping up to spend the night with my laptop and stalking bloggers in blogville. I can bet I will feel sleepy after this post.

Life is truly in phases, look at me I am getting married! I am the bride at the wedding on feb 21st, 2009. Time has got wings, it really flies.
All those times I wished I was the bride at a wedding, its here, I am not a guest attending a wedding; WAOH! Its MY WEDDING. Like some people will say "NA ME BE DIS!"

The new vocabulary I will use more often now are husband,family, children,responsiblity, home,submission,faithfulness etc. Its really interesting to discover that Life has changed from being the cutest chic in class to being the Best wife and mother in my home.

As teenagers we are always eager to grow up, we want to wear make-up at 14, have a boyfriend at 16, have a tatto at 18 and plenty piercing, basically do what "big" people do,forgetting that we can never fastforward the phases of our life, we are meant to go through each phase.

There was a time, when being invited to a 10th year birthday party was the in-thing. Dressed in ballon dresses with belts at the back, white socks with our hair packed into a bun at the back with the bow ribbon was a weekend well spent.In all our innocence.
Chair dance was enough to proof that we had the latest dance steps and winning a chair dance, shows how competitive we can be.

Then we graduated into secondary school and having a crush was as normal as normal can be.We had crush on everything and anyone. The likes of micheal jackson, mc hammer, richard gere, red lips, left hand etc and would want to wear a top like any member of TLC or SWV or have our hair styled like any music stars. We felt mumcs were 2nd to witches when they forced us to still wear the ballon dresses in J.S.3 when we could shake buddies better in tight jeans skirts! A new guy in the neighbour was a potential toaster and we will cry our eyes out when we discover he does not care a hoot about us. The many phases of Life

Suddenly, we have passed through the phases and what we think of is the color shade of our wedding gown and gradually the vocabularies just change.

Life brings all the opportunities and its lessons, what I have learnt: don't miss any phase of your life. Rock it 'cos you will never have it again. Don't rush out of it enjoy every bit of it and let God take you out of that phase in his own beautiful time.

If you are a teen blogger reading this, enjoy the phase of wearing your lip gloss, don't rush to wear the red lipstick, I can tell you- lip-sticks can leave visible stains!

All the single sistas in the house, enjoy your singleness, let the prince in shinning armour find you; don't go out looking for him. God designed him to find you. but while you are waiting, you can spend quality time preparing your lamps like the 5 wise virgins waiting for the bridegroom in the bible.

The newlyweds (I fall into this category) let's savour each moment of our lives with our husbands.The babies are not here yet. We can fortify our relationship/marriage at this time.

To all the mumcs in the house, enjoy the wahala your babies and children bring and give. There will be a time, that all you will have left is their mobile phone nos.

Life is beautiful! enjoy every bit of it.You have no business struggling with any phase of it, Let God take you through it in his own way. If you have to compete, let it be with your past not with the next person. Any competition you must dare, must be to outdo your past!

On this note, I'm out, I'll be back as newly wed with all the details of how I spent my final week as a spinister as well as being the bride at the wedding on the 21st.

ciao!

I feel sleepy now( I said it!)

Life After Feb 21 on Blogville

2009-02-03T02:20:00.000-08:00

18days to go!

Its interesting how suddenly you are the center of people's affection, everyone wants to wait on you and offer you some help. I am actually very bad at receiving help(I noticed this during my planning). The same things I do for my friends when they are getting married excitedly, i noticed I was skeptical about getting friends or families doing them for me. My colleague in the office said "Many people know how to give but don't know how to receive" this I find very true in my case. I can give of my self freely without any coercion but find it difficult to entrust people with what concerns me.

All the same I didn't feel stressed, I was glad I was doing them myself, for myself. Though quite a number of my friends insisted they must take charge whether i like it or not. (I have a bridal shower planned courtesy them)

My post is actually on life after feb 21, I am missing so many things about the planning process already, my wedding notepad,wedding dress(can't believe its just for one day why? maybe I should wear mine everyday...lol), the excitement of everyone coming home for the wedding, the plenty talking on the phone with vendors(as if credit is free lol).

I will miss browsing wedding resource sites( I have various book-marked), reading about wedding rings,wedding shoes, wedding themes, reception favors, wedding blogs etc. I will miss all my wedding magazines,( I will need to give them out) i will definitely miss all the beautiful things about a wedding

What am I left with after feb 21, My handsome friend and husband(MY KING), our new home filled with God's presence,the two metals on my fourth finger on my left hand, the prefix MRS. and the new surname, my automatically switched marital status from single to married and many more which I bet I will soon discover.

I will probably do more things with wedding ceremonies, maybe do post on wedding ideas, wedding supplies etc.

After feb 21, I will still blog, and blog and blog. It will be more on my journey as a married woman, maybe a mother (when it happens maybe soon) and definitely on weddings, weddings, weddings and weddings.

ciao

My wedding vendors cont'd

2009-01-15T01:25:00.001-08:00

Bride's Dress: Hilton bridals(Amy Lee).: The woman has a factory in Singapore(i think?), she does not re-sell. She has agents all over especially in the U.S. You can get her to introduce an agent to you. Her dresses are quite cheap and from agents you can get it on discount sef. Though shipping and special orders may jack up the cost. I eventually bought my dress through this agent, www.weddingdressonline.com. The guy speaks very little english though he is in the U.S. You may need to send numerous mails to him before he gets the information right, he replies mails promptly anyway.If you are thinking of a beautiful dress that its cost won't break the bank and yet of good quality.I think Amy Lee is a good choice.

Groom's Shirt and Waist coat: www.tomsawyerwaistcoats.co.uk : They got nice collection of waist coats and shirts. Top quality fabric. Email replies are prompt. They send fabric swatches to you before you order is made. I recommend ample time for ordering. Prices are.... well, not exactly cheap but you will like what you see eventually.

Wedding Shoes: Bought it online, while on holiday, something Ann Michelle. Nothing really extra to the shoe except that its a silver sandal with some diamond or is it white stones.(lol!)

Wedding Bands and Rings: Deinte(Wedding Ring Plus); Silverbird Galleria, Ahmadu Bello way. V.I. Lagos:- You can be sure to see the same rings you see from jewellry shops abroad here. The sales reps are courteous, a sales rep attends to you immediately you walk in and helps you throughout the selection process. It is not as expensive as you will think or expect 'cos of its location. Reasonably priced for such precious metals.

Hair:Esther;08026481496, My personal Hair dresser; She fixes most of the "flatest" weavon I have ever seen. The babe is good. Her works on bridal hair is excellent. She is very very good.

This concludes the post on wedding vendors. I am available for questions. If you think I have left anything out, let me know.

ciao

My wedding vendors

2009-01-14T04:22:00.000-08:00

I should have done this earlier as I promised but I just kept postponing it. I have compiled a list of my wedding vendors, most of them have at best an email,(definitely no websites) and of course their phone numbers. I have tried to put their office addresses.

Most of my vendors are in Ibadan, since I am having a kinda "out of town" wedding; I can say they are the best you can find around. count on me on this! I strongly recommend them for anyone having a wedding outside Lagos especially in the south-west region. They are innovative and professional(these guys must pay me o!). They have not done my jobs though; but their past works speak for them. I am most impressed about their services.

Here we go:

Cake Maker: Deola Layade-Exquisito Cakes; 08054255727,08030720212,exquisitocakesng@yahoo.com. You can also find her on facebook. Deola is very attentive, a trait that is very rare amongst Nigerian vendors, and has some marvellous cake concepts. She has fantastic ideas in serving cakes other than cake boxes.
I was tripped by the fact that there was a cake tasting part to the negotiations!

Decor Man: Favor Essang-Dexterity Plus; 08034393671. ; kenosiwa@yahoo.com. Favor is very innovative and has one of the finest table and chair linens you can find around but he is e-x-p-e-n-s-i-v-e. cost is relative anyway. I had given up on using him because of the cost but I changed my mind when I saw his job at another wedding. It was breath-taking. If you decide to use him, don't say I didn't tell you o!

Caterer: Mrs Omokanwaiye-Moks Catering; Oshuntokun Avenue Old Bodija Ibadan. My mum has used her for as long as I can remember. I think my mum likes her cos of the stress she takes off her shoulder, yet getting value for money. You can trust her to return all the leftovers after a party and she's got neat and matured servers.

Drinks: Coca Cola: I don't have any information on them other than they are COCA-COLA

Wedding Invitations & Program: Koza Invitations; 08034054510;Adedamola Ojomo Close, Bode Thomas Surulere Lagos. Their Invitation cards are impressive and they keep to appointments.

Bridesmaid Dresses: Ma cherie, favos building Oluyole Way New Bodija Ibadan. This woman is also very attentive despite her age. she never tries to impose on you but will make wise suggestions. she's got a male ghanian tailor a very sharp guy. They also made my bolero and did a splendid alteration on my gown. Amazingly, most brides know her and can trust her for alterations on their gowns.

Maid of Honor Dress: Fiama Bridals; Opebi Allen Lagos. The sales rep, vivian is friendly. She's got a good personality for a bridal shop sales person.

Aso-ebi: Babasola Olusoga, Asoebi Planner. If you need to get the stress of aso-ebi off your shoulders, you can talk to this guy. He's got good marketing skills though, he ensures you get fine materials, packages it well as well as deliver to you friends

Aso-Oke: Vicadab Enterprises; Yemetu Ibadan. A correct owambe woman. My mum likes her because she never disappoints and her designs and weaving is different. My engagement aso-oke was done beautifully.

Makeup: Mon Petite faces; Ronke Falade;08034710371,08057046475; petitefaces@yahoo.com; I got her contact first through Deola(the cake maker); She has a well maintained skin and especially face. I can't stand a "supposed" make-up artist with rough and black spotted face. I don't understand how you can make my face beautiful yet yours is nothing to look at. Also, you have an opportunity to see her work on your face first(make you Up), before the day.Besides she knows what oil-mattifier is!(lol)

Asun Maker:(Our favorite Asun Maker in Ibadan); Mr Olu; Premier Hotel, Swimming pool side, Ibadan; You can count on Mr Olu for mouth-watering, tongue biting Asun Special.

Chops and Chapman:(happy Pan): Though she won't be able to do the the job again. Her EDD is close to the date so I am still looking for someone else. My mum is making alternative arrangements though.

Music; K.S. Aboyade; If you like and want a mix of Sunny Ade , yinka Ayefele and a few Modern music. This young man is a correct option.

I have to get back to work; I will continue on my wedding vendors in my next post.

ciao!

Wassap with project feb21

2009-01-09T01:14:00.000-08:00

Wedding preparations have kept me so and annoyingly busy(my flair for details caused it) sometimes I get to the point where I'm like I can't wait for the day to come and go jare! before you know it I have switched to the excitement mode again. I spend many times on the phone as well as plenty money on recharge cards. My conversation is either on giving directions or informing one vendor about a decision or something wedding sha. Wedding planning require plenty energy!

Aso-ebi distribution is going on and I really want it to end by January. This means no more aso-ebi by feb 01. Most of my friends have responded and have picked up their materials. Some friends come up with lines like " why are you picking woodin and not ankara" or " I have a gele already in that color" + plenty unprintable lines. I am also amazed by the prompt response of people I didn't expect will be interested in the aso-ebi thing. They even paid into my account the moment they got the sms.

A good Nigerian wedding(one where there is plenty rice and stew with takeaway) is quite expensive. Good services need to be paid for as many vendors are just myopic about their business. You ask a "supposed" make-up artist if she uses oil-mattifier and she is just clueless! With vendors you can't afford to assume else you will discover that what you get is a shoddy job/service all in the name "don't worry no one will notice or that's the way it is done".

Some other vendors can be so stuck in their ways that they just don't want you to change their sterotyped way of doing things. Sometimes they try to talk you out of your own ideas sef.

Once they hear that its a wedding, their prices kinda shoot up and you have to do plenty convincing and negotiations to reach a reasonable price. One of the lessons I learnt, make sure you negotiate any price you are given for a service. There's nothing like a flat rate in naija o! Infact you can even push it further further sef. Just remember that the good and professional ones don't usually come cheap, but you can still get some prices off with them.

Counselling classes have been interesting, Sd and I have 2 more sessions to go, Its interesting to listen to people who have been on the journey before us. Our counselling classes gave us the opportunity to meet with 5 different couples. Couple A has only been married for 6months, Couple B for 4yrs, Couple C for 15yrs, Couple D for 21yrs and Couple E for 35yrs.

Marriage is really an institution, its an institution where success is determined by 2 people.It requires a lot of selflessness, patience and prayer. Couple E advised us to know each other's resolve on marriage as that will be one of the anchor we will need when the challenges come.

Our IVs are out, all vendors fully booked, attires(engagement+wedding) are ready while SD and I are on the fasting mode(3times a week) as the church requires.

ciao

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

2009-01-02T11:45:00.002-08:00

Happy new year blogville, its our year of 7 fold increase. Increase in speed, increase in ability,increase in knowledge and increase in wisdom. 2008 was a good year but with so much joy in my heart, I know 2009 has greater things in stock.

I have received a lot of sms on my phone, even though many sound like a 'cliche' but the fact still remains that these 'smses' brings about so much encouragement for the new year.

2008 is my last year as a spinister and I have about 50days to go for the D-day.

Thank God for his grace that abound in 2008, I look forward to a much greater measure of grace in 2009.

I pray for every blogville member; that this year, the presence of God will mantle you, you will gain speed without limitations as well as joy overwhelming.

I'm running with Isaiah 61 this year. That part of the scriptures is loaded.

I have to go now, project feb 21 is almost here, I am busy with last minute runs for the wedding. I desire all things to be sorted out before 1st week of february.

for now, ciao!

Yipee! My Laptop is Back

2008-12-29T02:52:00.000-08:00

My laptop is back, I'm so excited I have missed the little thing, so blogging resumes again.

My Laptop is On Break!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-12-15T22:45:00.000-08:00

My peeps, My laptop is on break, the motherboard is bad and IT Support in my office can be annoying so I'm stuck with a desktop and trust me its definitely not fun blogging with desktop keyboard.It can be wacky! and I have lots and lots and lots to blog about.

I will blog before the end of this week, my posts would be under the following headings: weddings and its cost, my wedding vendors, taste and choices, my marriage counselling sessions.

Till then, I'm out!

ciao

Saturday till Date-Part 2

2008-11-26T05:21:00.000-08:00

Sunday
Sunday started cool, went to my church in IB, service went well, nice atmosphere, God was present, everyone was pleasant, looking fine halleluyah!
Had to return back to Lagos, well since SD was not leaving IB on sunday I had to find my way.
SD called to say one of his Sis(let's called her princess) wants to see me that she was complaining about the color and that we are not carrying her along.

1. Princess complained that she has a problem with Gold as the groom's family color for the wedding day. That Gold is too dull bla bla bla. That because of the color chosen by the Bride's family, peach/orange that the only color that sits well is gold and that we shouldn't have picked a color that is so restrictive like that. "e gba mi o"(see me see trouble- I need to consult her on the color theme for my wedding). SD was obviously pissed when he was talking on the phone and I guess she must have said some things which he decided not to mention. I was furious at her complaints, "Did she just realize that Gold is dull?" what color would the almighty PRINCESS prefer, I would have gone to her house and knelt before her to decide for my wedding color theme abi? cos she's the groom's sister! RUBBISH

2. Her 2nd complaint was that she's not being carried along, that she knows about parties and can plan parties bla bla bla. That she does not know what we are wearing, our accessories, our plans etc. help me " What is her business" How in the world do I need to carry her along? She is like 12yrs older than me, I am alive and well to plan my wedding what else do I want from her, I have a mother that can equally plan also alive and well, besides I have 3 "correct" chics as sisters, 2 have gone through this road of wedding planning before so why do I need her. I think she should concentrate more on whatever they need to do from their end and understand that wedding ceremonies and parties are majorly the responsibilities of the bride,groom and the bride's family ( well I may be wrong!). I don't even want all this wahala o, before marriage. Why do people just want to assume roles that are not conferred on them?
She has become my prayer-point from sunday(lol).
I slept off furious and upset.

Monday
Resumed for the week, thought of calling sis-in-law-to-be and explain but changed my mind joo. I told SD to call and tell her that she's at liberty to decide on whatever color she/the groom's family wants but they should atleast PLsssssssssssssssssss pick a color that will work and create a nice combo with the colors of the day(I am not ready to change color theme-The Holy spirit is my wedding co-ordinator He will ensure we have a colorful,beautiful and perfect day.It wont be riotous in jesus name). I want to apply wisdom and just call her by friday to greet her and tell her I will be coming around by weekend to say hi to her and the KIDS(probably buy pizza and some apples along sef) a man's gift maketh way for him! I will let her know we are on top of things and ask her to suggest a few vendors to atleast make her feel important, I don't intend using any of her vendors though, I'ld come up with a reason why they are not suitable. Trust me I'm good at such!

Wednesday

Thought you should know my peeps, I got a text from PRINCESS today saying"Iyawo wa, how's work, hope d planning is nt 2 stressful takia"

I replied her text and said " mo wa ok, tried calling you last nite(dat na lie o!) wanted 2 tell u I'ld be comin ard by wkend nice day"

Maybe she was just concerned after all!

Prayer works, but learn to deal with in-laws!

ciao

Saturday till Date-Part 1

2008-11-26T03:18:00.000-08:00

What's being happening to u guys? My weekend was loaded with issues its all sorted out now anyway...

Saturday: Travelled to Ibadan( U know now, countdown to D-day don begin...I think its abt 86days left).
Sd was in IB already so we tried to link up. I saw him and my mood changed from "Excited" bride to "I want to Post-pone Bride" I need a psychologist to define that kind of mood swing.
I think what I wanted was pure and plain simple attention which I eventually got.

That's how moi just starting fuming and all. for what-I dont know o oooooooooo! o su emi gan sef( I can't explain it myself). Then the words came out " I think we should postpone this wedding" Sd acted like he didn't hear what I said so I repeated myself(crazy me!lol). I'm sure SD at that moment would think Omo yi wa on drugs or something(this girl is on drugs or something).

I had a big notepad on my laps with subject- Wedding 210209- "madam wedding planner bride" ,I just fixed an appointment with the small chops caterer, I had to see the Madam making my Aso-Oke yet I was thinking of postponing, Infact I just called a friend on my way from lagos to tell her my wedding is in feb and I was excited saying it( Something just had to be wrong with me, my mum would have said " O gbadun"-you are not well).

Well, the mood died off, how? after SD did all the scoping and all. He said he thinks I'm just stressed( I don't think so lol!) and need to relax, that I'm getting too pre-occupied with the ceremony,that its just a one day thing,bla bla bla. That everything will come out perfectly the way I ( sorry we) want it,after all the scoping and all, my" imported" mood was "exported" back to where it came from, we went for a meal and I had my "excited" bride mood back plus my wedding date is still intact jare!.yipeeeeeeeeeeeee

Went to Aso-oke Madam's shop. The woman was a little unco-ordinated, and I was kinda pissed but all the details with her is sorted out.
Noticed mummy's wedding notepad as we moved from one place to the other, hers is bigger than mine sef! I noticed she kept on writing inside the notepad and asking questions after questions. I couldn't be bothered I was tired and needed to rest. Our engagement and thanksgiving trad was settled on saturday plus aso-ebis for the mummys.

Our Aso-Oke will be ready in december(Mummy can vouch that the aso-oke madam does not disappoint).so hopefully we would have it then. So our trad wear is no longer on pending list!

Advice to brides, take some time out to let your groom pamper you jare!. Make a fuss about your details, but don't over do it o! You need the tender,loving ,care during your planning process its a form of encouragement.

To be continued!

Voila! My Wedding Dress...

2008-11-20T03:41:00.000-08:00

Yipee!!!!! see my dress ooooo. Now, I believe I am actually getting married. This is a snapshot of my wedding dress, I decided to post the same picture I fell in love with, when I saw it the first time on the internet.Taking the pictures with my phone was not as sharp I would have loved it, so I decided to use this.The one from the bridal shop website- good enough. abi????

Trust me, this dress is mind-blowing when you see it "Live". I am loving it for real. I looked at it again last night and I was like "this dress is really me o, babe must to be fine for feb21 o! and must to enter clothe well well for wedding day o"(you don't want to imagine what I went through before I decided on this dress)

Also in this post, is a picture of my proposed bouquet.
I am looving every bit of my wedding preps!!!!

Let me relax while I expect your comments on my wedding dress.

ciao!

(dress has been removed for now)

Mass Wedding

2008-11-18T06:40:00.000-08:00

Hi People,
Nice to blog again, how was the weekend mine was ok, well plans are falling into shape and the puzzles are making sense now. I feel a lot refreshed from my last post and I am excited as the days draw by.
I was at a wedding last saturday. I'm eager to attend weddings this days maybe its in anticipation for the big day. It was a former colleague's wedding, ordinarily I won't have attended...the anticipation right

It was a mass wedding,MASS WEDDING!!! It had funny episodes, but I captured it all.

First Episode
* There were 11 couples(meaning 22individuals). All lined before the Priest. It looked more like a recital ceremony.
* All the couples were IBO(no cross marriages why?).Full fledged Ibos
* The recitations(vows) had to go through 22individuals( We must all marry!)
* The 22individuals were from all spheres( from the phonetized ones to the heavily accentized ones). Some couples looked so old, that you would wonder if its a re-marriage. I suppose so anyway, maybe after years of traditional marriage.Catholic church requires a church wedding.

Second Episode
* There was nothing like being led down the aisle. All couples were expected to be seated. So no traditional "Here comes the Bride"
*The ceremony started at the "dot of 10".
* Couples were requested to stand(in a straight line) before the officiating priest
* Two grooms were present without their brides(wonder where they were,women sha!)
* The program started without the two brides.
* Here comes the first bride, looking stressed and all. She didn't even walk majestically(She's late anyway). She had to meet up with her groom.
* The second bride also arrives like 5mins after.(na wa o!)

Third Episode

* There is the microphone bearer,He is responsible for ensuring that all the 22individuals have the microphone when they need to say their responses.
* The priest goes "We are gathered here for the wedding of Peter John and James Mary,.....Cynthia Davids and David Samuel" bla bla bla (for the 11 couples)
* The couples(22individuals) reply with "Yes I will". The microphone bearer travels with the microphone for all the 22 individuals.(Imagine the movement of the microphone bearer)
*Exchange of rings follow the same procedure, this time you unveil the bride and kiss the bride after the rings is exchanged (I was thinking it would be simultaneously atleast we can see the longest kisses).
* The priest announces "I present to you Mr & Mrs Cynthia Davids,.....Mr&Mrs Samuel Jones bla bla bla.

I enjoyed the drift sha, though you will wonder if some of the couples were re-inventing their own vows or they were actually reading from the program, some just kept on mixing up the vows.I felt for the photographer and videographer, it must have been such a task to ensure that images captured during the church service are solely the couple's to prevent having an album full of unknown guests.

I didn't get a wedding program during the service there were various so you had to be sure you were getting the one for the couple you are representing, the bridal train were of various styles. There was rainbow of colors.

Photo sessions were interesting,you find couples in every available space. The church service was a funny first time experience of a mass wedding.

Reception was at a nearby garden, the crowd was controlled, the decor was still being done while guests were seated, naija decorators!yet it was sparsely decorated(maybe at the request of the couple sha).

There was a DJ and a band I wonder why? Cos the DJ ended up mixing up the couple's wedding song(they couldn't dance to it again), of course there was a clash of music while the DJ played music, the band played their drums. It took the intervention of the MC and the groom to be firm with the two.

Reception did not start until after the kolanut breaking(That part I liked, it didn't waste time and the essence of culture was still achieved)

Food was buffet(surprised hunn!) yes o. I enjoyed that part, remember crowd was controlled so buffet arrangement wasn't so bad took about 15mins to get food.
Buffet meant we didn't have food until the couples were seated though appetiser was served, garden egg and groundnut paste(Ibo delicacy).

Drinks flowed freely,cake was "maggi-cubed sized"(though the wedding cake was 6tier) and the MC wasn't bad. I had a good time both at the church and at the reception. Learnt some lessons which must be put in place at my own wedding. Isn't that wise!

My dress arrived yesterday via UPS, in perfect condition!Tried it on last night,1st trial! perfect size I'm "waohed" designers can be good sha o! I will post it up now. I'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooo excited. I need to make a bolero now! where can i get that down.Need help peeps!

ciao

I'm Just there...

2008-11-10T02:27:00.000-08:00

Hi people,

My weekend was just there jare, this wedding thing na wa o. All I think about is wedding,wedding,wedding nothing else. I have sore-throat already due to the plenty talking and explanations to people,already I'm thinking maybe I'm hard to please sef and asking too much from people and vendors. If its not arguing about a particular detail its about convincing SD that something is important for the day and we need to pay for it. O su mi jare.

One of the girls I invited to be on my train called me few minutes ago and was sounding like she didn't want to be on the train again, I choose not to be bothered joo, I pray she speaks up fast so I can replace her with someone else.

My thoughts keep drifting to the D-Day, I keep wondering, how the day will be like,I keep wondering what the decor will be like, what if the color is eventually off(my wedding colors are gold,orange and cream), hope my makeup won't be off, what if my dress does not look as good as I think,hope the pictures would come out nicely even the reception after party hope our friends have a good time bla bla bla.

I have been so worried about this things I really need to spend some time talking to God about my wedding day O and stop all this unnecessary worrying. I have heard gist that no wedding is perfect! but why can't it just be perfect?

Ok , Ok, I think I should focus on my plans and preparations as the days roll by.

Its amazing how I have become so involved and interested in my wedding.I'm usually not so particular about things like this, well i guess thats the way the story goes.

I hope to get out of this mood soon and continue enjoying my planning process.
for now I'm out of here.

ciao

The Reason I am Significant

2008-11-03T22:50:00.000-08:00

The gifts and talents I have cannot define who I am. They simply define what I have received to serve this generation.
My spiritual or natural accomplishments also fail short to define my value because if they would, my worthiness will be subject to how well I performed or achieved a certain thing.

The important people I know and how well i'm connected in society does not define who I am, it only shows relations. The same goes for my Physical Attributes,Success in ministry,Career etc everything has its place but can never be the reason why I feel important and successful.

If any of the above defines my identity im scheduled for serious disappointment and failure I should know I crashed against that wall for several years.

Today the reason I feel valuable and important is because I have known and believed that God burns with intense desire for me. I’m what he wants forever put differently the uncreated God and Ruler of the universe is lovesick for me and I am the object of his affection.

My personal ministry could vanish or I could reach billons of people yet both scenarios would not affect my essential greatness before God and I could never improve or diminish the intensity of his desire for me

food for thought ciao!

Pablo Perez

Preps! Preps!! Preparation!!!

2008-11-01T10:16:00.000-07:00

Now the preparations are in top gear, i find myself sleeping and waking up thinking of marriage sorry the ceremonies. I have been dealing with vendors here and there. Some can be reasonable,pleasant and know their onions well while some are really rude, unsure of the trade they are in and not versatile at all.

Anyway, I have met a number of my vendors for the day and I have been able to get the very good ones that can actually think outside the box and not stereotyped at all. I will do a post very soon on my vendors and why I settled for them.

I also had to deal with overbearing sisters-in-law that are more interested in turning my wedding into theirs not caring what I want. I thank God for everything i have been able to be in charge of everything and my God has been faithful.

I have found myself hooked to anything that starts with "WED" from websites to blogs to magazines, everything in the wedding industry I am hooked to it. I am grateful to omosewa for the wedding websites it has given me lots of ideas, oluwadee for how she planned and organised herself well for her wedding and of course naijablue7 for a vast idea on weddings.

I have also drafted some of my friends into the wedding plans. their responsibilities vary from checking up with vendors to ensuring that aso-ebi gets to everyone and a lot lot more.

Just before i stop the keystrokes , I can say I have crossed some hurdles in my wedding plans though i know i cant afford to go to sleep with my two eyes closed,nigerian vendors won't allow, you must always check on them to be sure they are still on the same page as you.

My next post would be on the vendors and some of the funny episodes I went through.

ciao

MY INTRODUCTION

2008-10-20T07:19:00.000-07:00

One down two to go! my introduction was last saturday and i had a swell time. I had a few jitters anyway but God was faithful. I stood by God's word in Phillipians 4:6-7. and this is one scripture i'm dead sure i will forever stay with.

Big sis 2 had i first child on friday... a baby girl and the excitement and joy was inexplicable.

As i was saying, saturday came before our very eyes, i was a little bit jittery, plans were in top gear everyone seem to have entered the ceremony with all their "bodies". Things were falling into line one after the other. People started arriving and I just tried to keep up the face so as not betray me jittery feelings.

Everyone waited on me and it felt good to be waited upon. I felt so important, i kept on calling sd like every 30mins to know wassap with him he seem to just be taking everything in and having a good time as well.

Then let me fast forward to the arrivals, apparently peeps had called quite a number of unexpected people and I was expected to come downstairs and welcome them as "iyawo" now. Somehow all the bold face disappeared and all i had left was that shy part of me.

anyway introduction was meant to start by 1pm, i took my time to do my make-up and make myself the beautiful me once again. I did my makeup to precision.(I'll post the pictures sometimes soon). My makeup was set, and that was like 1pm already and sd and his own peeps were nowhere to be found.
I kept on calling over and over again and they kept saying they were on their way.

Fastforward again, introduction started, all the banters and all. Then food, food and food.

In all I had a great event it was worth every single person that was there and I give all d glory to God!

Blog o Blog!

2008-09-20T08:51:00.000-07:00

Dearest Blog
its being a while, i have been so busy travelling and all.there's so much planning going on and God has blessed me with a lovely darling girl as my wedding planner and she's being splendid somehow i'm excited to be involved in every stage of my planning.
our site is under construction and its coming out so beautifully, also i got the greatest of all insights that my wedding co-ordinator should be the Holy Spirit. He is the one that will remind me of all things that needs to be done. He will help all the vendors to put finishing touches to all the plans as well as go an extra mile in ensuring that everything comes out well.
i have also been busy browsing sites to decide on color theme for my engagement,i have finally arrived at all shades of blue which i think has a too much wow factor and mind u my wedding color is orange/peach,champagne and gold. I can already imagine the ambience of that day.
Also, we are still deciding on where we want to go for honeymoon,sd is keen on spain but somehow i think its too expensive. I am currently checking on france which i'm sure is about the same price. We really want our honeymoon to be somewhere other than US and UK. maybe and african country but of cos not Ghana?
All plans are on deck, i definitely need suggestions at this juncture. All comments and informative sites are most welcome.
Lest I forget Blog o Blog, i have finally decided on my dress. Ordered it already, will describe it on the pages of this blog though the pages is too inadequate to describe the beauty of the dress. I strongly believe that na baba God lead me to the dress. you can trust that moi, is sliming down seriously so that she can enter into it perfectly. One thing i can say about the dress, it is specially made for me.
Blog O Blog, I will be back.

Planning 101

2008-08-07T00:17:00.000-07:00

the planning begins...
things to work on(this is in no particular order)

wedding clothes(bride and groom)
traditional clothes
shoes and accessories
caterer,food and drinks
cake(wedding and engagement)
invitation,order of programme & thank you card
hair and makeup
bouquet & buttoniere
lingerie and underwear
brides maid dress
reception venue
venue decoration
music
marriage proposal(reply letter)
wedding rings
videography
photography
MC
Aso Ebi
Souvenir
Photo Shoot
Wedding Site
Pre-Wedding Party

I need more suggestions, as to vendors and things i have left out

A SPECIAL WORLD

2008-08-06T06:14:00.000-07:00

A special world for you and me
A special bond one cannot see
It wraps us up in its cocoon
And holds us fiercely in its womb.
Its fingers spread like fine spun gold
Gently nestling us to the fold
Like silken thread it holds us fast
Bonds like this are meant to last.

And though at times a thread may break
A new one forms in its wake
To bind us closer and keep us strong
In a special world, where we belong.

Written by Sheelagh Lennon

the man called SD

2008-08-06T02:30:00.000-07:00

I introduce to you the man called sd, my love and darling, the love of my life.

I met this man, and my view of life has changed forever, his wisdom is incomparable, his wealth of knowledge is unquantifable, his caring nature is too deep to comprehend.

Sd, is a strong man, a man of valour. he has weathered the storms,sailed across seas and has arrived at the shore.

I see a man taught of the school of the spirit, accurate in all things and of high integrity. Sd rocks my world, a mere thought of him makes tears roll down my face, everyday i am more convinced that God brought sd into my life for a purpose. Everything was orchestrated by God himself, I am more convinced this is a man sent to change the course of destiny.

If you need a man that can imagine and dream then it is my sd, and if you need to meet a man that can put a face to his dreams and imaginations its my darling, the guy has massive dreams and ideas.

In business, he is a clear leader the donald trumps and warren buffets of our time will be green with envy when they see the kind of empire my sd is building in business.

Sd is blessed and highly favored, he is my #1 cheerleader, he is never disturbed about anything,impossible does not exist with him, he has been there for me at my lowest times.

He has encouraged me to be strong and confident. He has taught me how to love and be happy with myself. Everyday with my sd is a special day. I dont have to keep things till a special day.

He has encouraged me to think wide and smart, he has taught me how to love and to give love. He has taught me how to love and serve God. He has taught me how to never wait for a second time to make a first impression, he has taught me how to always put my best foot forward at all times,he has taught me that the shot at life can only be once so i have to celebrate everyday of my existence truly I have a brother in him.

When you see a man that adores,nurtures and delights in the good thing he has found, then such a man should be commended.

He listens to my whinnings and yet they are like sweet music in his ears. What has blessed me more about this my sd, is his love for God, he never moves an inch until he is convinced that it is God leading him, he loves God with all his heart.

If i am to do it all over again, i will do it with my SD, and this is the reason why my journey dtA will be incomplete without taking it with my SD.

Random Thoughts

2008-08-05T00:12:00.000-07:00

moi, has finally done the formal announcements the next thing now is to start praying and planning. lots of praying and lots of planning.
i am grateful to God for the privilege he has given me, great grace, i am not so faithful but yet he takes delight in me he has given me reasons to be joyful and thankful.
in him i live,move and have my being. in him i have done valiantly and leapt over a wall i can do all things throught him.
he has delivered me and has kept me safe. i most grateful to God. without God i am an empty vessel but with God i have done things even in my mind i cannot imagine or conceive.
the confessions and declarations i have done all my life has come to pass, he has blessed me with sd which i think it is for a reason because he didnt just come into my life, God brought him into my life and i know its for a purpose.
sd is my ministry(refer to the sd post)
i trust God for a lovely and blissful marriage, also for a great ceremony. from the depth of my heart i am most grateful to my creator the one that sees my greatest and deepest concern, the one that sees the tears on my pillow, i am most grateful......

THE FORMAL ANNOUNCEMENT

2008-08-04T05:03:00.000-07:00

saturday was the day for the formal announcement abi ki ni ka pe,well i finally told baba and mama. mama and i had spoken already in the afternoon apparently mama was warming up for the thing o! she wants to pick aso ebi too. trust mamas they have a way of scheming things we planned on how to say it. mama even almost burst it open sef before the planned time.

anyway sha, i was busy throughout saturday doing EE work(thank God i finished it), so i led the family prayer and then d tori begin. i psyched them first about everything,everything then i dropped the good news... I am getting married, silence broke throughout and then we took the prayers which i led. at that poinht i knew i had hit the gangan of baba's heart which explained why the silence broke.

i took the prayers after which everyone was expected to disperse, na so baba come talk say it is really hard for him o! he wished that we will never get to talk about it but he was happy anyway.or maybe i should say he had mixed feelings.
so introduction is fixed for october 4th and wedding for febuary 7th 2009. we discussed the form of the introduction will take. baba now talk say one of the reason wey he like sd na because he is not particular about travelling out of the country but that one na lie o!
in all sha, moi has started planning for the down the aisle days o! congratulobia to myself and sd, the countdown begins. So we set the ball rolling for the dtA days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE FIRST POST

2008-08-03T11:22:00.000-07:00

Yes, this is my first post, I'm excited about this. Right behind my desk, i am blogging and blogging away. I'm excited to blog about my own testimonial journey down the aisle, my leap of faith to take the vows, the giant stride, the new lease of life to hold hands with my soul mate and say I do.

I am excited, cos its the count down to the day I will say "...this day I say my vows",countdown to seeing that drop of tear when i take my first deep kiss, count down when our souls tie, count down to when i sign off my maiden name, countdown to so many other things......................

I am excited cos i can blog,blog and blog away! My count down DAYSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.....